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Hot Tub Hawk And The Pissed Off Colonel

Well! Here we are again. Everyone is sitting around this internet campfire, anxiously awaiting another Hawk story. Some of you are making S'mores. Others have crammed a stick into a hotdog and are now roasting it. I "Cope" with life and have a fat dip in. The only person I don't see is Hawk. Wait. There he is, and he keeps sticking his fingers into the fire to, "make sure it's still hot." I wonder if there is still a need to detail how mentally deficient or completely oblivious Hawk is? I strongly encourage you to read my previous stories if you have not been formally introduced to Hawk. I suspect you will continue to read anyways, so I offer you this: Hawk is the type of guy that gets into a spelling argument with his tattoo artist and walks out proud of his two-inch sized font forehead tattoo that reads "No Regerts."
We were in beautiful Iraq, a charming vacation destination for thousands of Americans. The vacation was all inclusive. The local women dressed like Pac-Man ghosts or ninjas, and countryside smelled like raw sewage and regret. Most of the locals were very hospitable, but some of the locals had a very strong desire to shout, "Praise Allah" while simultaneously trying to kill us. I am not bothered by much. Every human is entitled to their beliefs. We are also entitled to our own opinions. For example, I don't personally feel "man-dresses" and flip-flops are suitable combat attire, but who am I too judge? The only time I have an issue with people is when they are actively trying to kill me. I don't know why, but it really pisses me off. That and grape jelly.
We worked out of two different locations during this deployment. The majority of my Battalion worked out of a medium-sized Forward Operating Base (FOB), but we also operated out of a smaller FOB. We typically stayed at this other location for about ten days, and would rotate with another Platoon. The location was not horrible, but I personally hated the transient lifestyle. We lived out of our ruck-sacks, and had to find ways to occupy our time when we were not conducting raids or other missions. We didn't have the luxuries we had at "home." There were no gaming systems or large televisions. We simply had find ways to occupy ourselves.
Football was the game of choice for a couple weeks, then it got blacklisted. It had nothing to do with the ball being pigskin either. It was mostly due to poor mission analysis. Football was one of the few things we could all do and actually enjoyed, until it was too dark to play. We had a brilliant and genius idea. We fucking "own the night" with our Night Vision Goggle (NVGs), so why don't we rent it for a couple hours to finish the game? Game on Garth! We thought of everything. We drenched that infidel ball in Infrared (IR) chemlight (Glow Stick) juice. The depth perception problem was immediately evident. House took a fucking laser beam pass to the to the face. Two black eyes builds character though.
We can work through it though. His NVGs were still Fully Mission Capable (FMC), and we all realized that we needed to be a bit quicker. The fourth play from scrimmage was undoubtedly the best, and worst football play in the history of Iraq football. Fuck punting. We were going for it. It would have been easy to confuse Tony, our quarterback for Michael Vick from the shotgun. Tony was a Michael Vick with NVGs, and without the dog fighting felony. Tony evaded numerous rushers and then superbly delivered a fifty yard completion to Ryan. It was beautiful to watch, until it wasn't. NVG's are great, but they don't offer the same Field of View (FOV) your eye-nuggets offer. Ryan thought he was all alone and started a leisurely stroll to the end-zone. The he got fucking nuked from the top and bottom, in fucking reverse directions. Sure, Ryan broke a finger and required "some" stitches. Oh and they broke three sets of NVGs in one play, but damn that was a glorious fucking hit. It was first-and-ten, but our Platoon Sergeant was less than happy. Game off Wayne!
We were now bored again. There was another unit on the FOB with us, but they were not fans of us. The only real interaction we had was when their full-bird Colonel told us to, "stay the fuck away from his Soldiers." I don't know if one of the other Platoons ruined it for us, but the guy was just a complete prick to us.
We did our best to keep our reverse schedule, but it was just so boring during the evenings we were not working. The majority of us resorted to playing Spades or Echure, and others read. Hawk and a handful of others would take nightly showers and then seemed to vanish. "Knowledge is power" and I knew Hawk was utterly powerless. I knew better than to ever let that retarded bird spread his wings and fly solo. I didn't see any reason to worry though. The other people Hawk was with were far smarter than Hawk woud ever be. Furthermore, with football now off the table, there was really no way for anyone to get in trouble at this FOB.
Imagine Hawk in a cattle chute. If I put a box labeled "commonsense" on the opposite end, Hawk would never fucking find it. In a place he literally has no option but to find it, he would NOT FIND IT. EVER. However, if I had a box labeled "worst decision ever" and dropped it in the ocean, Hawk would fucking somehow stumble upon the lost city of Atlantis. I had never really got my ass chewed before I became Hawk's leader, but that trend went out the window when I inherited him.
We lived on the second floor, and my bunk was closest to the door that rotation. Thankfully too. I was woken up when I heard, "I want to talk to one of your leaders." I didn't know "who" was in trouble, but I had Hawk so I knew it was best to simply put my shoes on and assume I was in trouble by proxy. I didn't even wait to see if I would get to sit on the Green Army Weenie, I just spit in my hand and readied my o-ring for maximal insertion. It was too early for the sun to even be out, and I was already willingly walking to my execution. My how things had changed so quickly.
I walk outside and I see five Soldiers, one Hawk, and a fucking pissed of Colonel (COL).
COL: Are you their leader?
OP: I am one of them. How can I help you Sir?
COL: Do you know where I caught them?
This is where I would typically say something stupid, but this guy didn't look happy, and I didn't want to give him a reason to wake up someone who "may" have gave a shit as to why he was irate.
OP: No Sir. I don't.
COL: Above MY SHOWER?
I was now pissed. There was a large shower tent in the middle of large open courtyard. One half was male and the other was female. These fucking morons were spying on naked females? I want to kill them for listening to Hawk. Well, I assumed it was a Hawk idea. Like Hawk's brain, I was putting the cart before the horse. I assume it was Hawk, but I had questions.
OP: How in the fuck did you guys get on top the shower tent?
I was working myself into a frenzy. My brain does not operate like normal people brains. I was pretty pissed considering they violated the privacy of the beautiful ladies at the FOB, but I was actually more pissed they got on top of a fucking tent. They seemingly forgot everything about military tactics and got caught; that was the foremost reason for my anger. The spying on deployment 1's (binary thingy) was second. Considerably a far worse offense, but second at the point in time.
COL: NO. Not the shower tent. On my personal shower.
What? This guy was so special, he had a personal shower. What, he was too good to use the pallet floored showers like the rest of us? So maybe the Romanians (We think anyways) occasionally shit on the pallets and waffle-stomped the poop through the pallets, but the water pressure was phenomenal.
OP: You have a personal shower Sir, and they were on top?
COL: YES. I caught them in my water tank.
Well, back to being puzzled. I don't judge. I personally don't care if penis gazing is your hobby, but there are five of you? Why don't you just unleash your hogs and stare at each others? Anyways, how in the fuck did they all fit into the water tank? What the fuck did they do when they got inside? My god, my brain was running wild with unsightly pictures.
OP: My apologies Sir, but how did they all fit into your water tank?
COL: Come with my Sergeant; so you understand what I am talking about.
OP: You mother fuckers can wait for me in, the front-leaning-rest (Push-up position).
I still wasn't certain I entirely cared, but I thought this would may demonstrate that I showed concern about his fucking one-person shower. COL Prick then lead me around the side of the building and showed me his water tank. It was fucking huge. It was one of the typical hard plastic tanks, but the entire top had been cut off. God knows why, not like it was ever dusty in Iraq, but the top was no-more. It all made sense now. They weren't gay; they were chilling in a makeshift hot tub! Well, the gayness thing is up in the air, but I guess they were too loud while he was showering!?! I apologized profusely, but COL Prick had me locked up at the position of attention for at least ten minutes just dressing me down. I was a "really poor leader, and you're not going to go anywhere in the Army." Jokes on him, they haven't kicked me out yet.
COL: This is why nobody likes "cool guys." Words, words, words. You'd better do something about this, words, words, words. My penis is too small to shower with the big boys, words, words, words. NOW GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY SIGHT.
I returned to the Soldiers, whom were still all in the front-leaning-rest. I screamed, "GET ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE BUILDING. I DON'T WANT TO GO TO JAIL AFTER PEOPLE SEE ME SMOKE THE FUCKING LIFE FROM YOUR BODY. NOW FUCKING RUN." They fucking scurry, and I stroll to the other side of the building. Out of sight and out of mind.
(I will use "Group" unless Hawk is the person talking. Too many useless names otherwise.)
OP: That fucking dickhead has his own fucking shower! What the fuck?
GROUP: I know right?
OP: What the fuck were you guys thinking? I would expect this from at least one of you, but I won't point elbows. (I then just fucking stare at Hawk.)
GROUP: We didn't think anyone used it. We had never seen anyone go into the room, and the room looked empty. We saw the water tank on top, and just figured we would check it out.
OP: How the fuck did you even get up there?
GROUP: You can walk to it if you exit any second floor window on our building. Well, the courtyard side.
OP: So you guys just sneak out and hang out in this guys shower water?
GROUP: Yes, but we seriously thought nobody used it. We would not have used it otherwise.
OP:You fucking dip-shits think this was just a randomly placed unused water tank? You fucking idiots just stand in this guys shower water for hours?
HAWK: No. We are not dumb Sergeant. We sit on MRE (Meal Ready to Eat) boxes.
OP: HOW LONG HAS THIS BEEN GOING ON?
GROUP: (LaughteGiggles) Every night!?!
OP: We have been here for five days now! NO FUCKING MORE! I will fucking kill you if I get yelled at again over this. The only thing that makes me smile is the fact that he is showering with your ball funk.
Hawk: I have some excellent news then Sergeant
OP: Really? Whats Hawk?
Hawk: (Smirk) We made a promise that, "nobody pisses in the hot tub"...
OP: This is why your mother should have swallowed you Hawk. Why the fuck would that make me happy?
Hawk: (Laughing) Because I broke that rule every night. Most nights more than once!
GROUP: What the fuck Hawk! We have been lounging in your piss? What the fuck dude!
Hawk: I know. (Smiles.) I lied to you though! Cheer up Sergeant. I peed on him for you!
For the record, Hawk did not find the hot tub. He just peed in it, a lot. I don't think any of us paid attention because they came back from wet and with towels. I merely assumed they went to the showers. I suppose I should have kept better track of time. Also, I apologize if this was not as funny as the other Hawk tales. I realized it when I reread it, but it was certainly funny being on-the-ground and witnessing it. Can't laugh at them all I suppose. Remember, next week, "Hawk Walks Home: In Iraq." I don't think it is feasibly possible to not make that one funny. Lastly, some of my stories are a result of me being in the military, but not military. Those stories and others will/are posted at FuckeryUniveristy. I am not ever going to compete with this page, but I do need a place to post other stories and have little fear they will be taken down. The mod may be a huge prick, but at least I know the guy. Man...huge prick!
Cheers!
submitted by SloppyEyeScream to MilitaryStories [link] [comments]

Retard Bot Update 2: What is there to show for six months of work?

Retard Bot Update 2: What is there to show for six months of work?
What is there to show? Not shit, that's why I made this pretty 4K desktop background instead:
4K
On the real: I've been developing this project like 6 months now, what's up? Where's that video update I promised, showing off the Bot Builder? Is an end in sight?
Yes sort of. I back-tested 6 months of data at over 21% on a net SPY-neutral, sixteen year span of time including 2 bear, 2 bull, 2 crab months. But that's not good enough to be sure / reliable. I had gotten so focused on keeping the project pretty and making a video update that I was putting off major, breaking changes that I needed to make. The best quant fund ever made, the Medallion fund, was once capable of roughly 60% per year consistently, but in Retard Bot's case 1.5% compounded weekly. "But I make 60% on one yolo" sure whatever, can you do it again every year, with 100% of your capital, where failure means losing everything? If you could, you'd be loading your Lambo onto your Yacht right now instead of reading this autistic shit.

The End Goal

1.5% compounded weekly average is $25K -> $57M in 10 years, securing a fairly comfortable retirement for your wife's boyfriend. It's a stupidly ambitious goal. My strategy to pull it off is actually pretty simple. If you look at charts for the best performing stocks over the past 10 years, you'll find that good companies move in the same general trajectory more often than they don't. This means the stock market moves with momentum. I developed a simple equation to conservatively predict good companies movements one week into the future by hand, and made 100%+ returns 3 weeks in a row. Doing the math took time, and I realized a computer could do much more complex math, on every stock, much more efficiently, so I developed a bot and it did 100% for 3 consecutive weeks, buying calls in a bull-market.
See the problem there? The returns were good but they were based on a biased model. The model would pick the most efficient plays on the market if it didn't take a severe downturn. But if it did, the strategy would stop working. I needed to extrapolate my strategy into a multi-model approach that could profit on momentum during all different types of market movement. And so I bought 16 years of option chain data and started studying the concept of momentum based quantitative analysis. As I spent more and more weeks thinking about it, I identified more aspects of the problem and more ways to solve it. But no matter how I might think to design algorithms to fundamentally achieve a quantitative approach, I knew that my arbitrary weights and variables and values and decisions could not possibly be the best ones.

Why Retard Bot Might Work

So I approached the problem from all angles, every conceivable way to glean reliably useful quantitative information about a stock's movement and combine it all into a single outcome of trade decisions, and every variable, every decision, every model was a fluid variable that machine learning, via the process of Evolution could randomly mutate until perfection. And in doing so, I had to fundamentally avoid any method of testing my results that could be based on a bias. For example, just because a strategy back-tests at 40% consistent yearly returns on the past 16 years of market movement doesn't mean it would do so for the next 16 years, since the market could completely end its bull-run and spend the next 16 years falling. Improbable, but for a strategy outcome that can be trusted to perform consistently, we have to assume nothing.
So that's how Retard Bot works. It assumes absolutely nothing about anything that can't be proven as a fundamental, statistical truth. It uses rigorous machine learning to develop fundamental concepts into reliable, fine tuned decision layers that make models which are controlled by a market-environment-aware Genius layer that allocates resources accordingly, and ultimately through a very complex 18 step process of iterative ML produces a top contender through the process of Evolution, avoiding all possible bias. And then it starts over and does it again, and again, continuing for eternity, recording improved models when it discovers them.

The Current Development Phase

Or... That's how it would work, in theory, if my program wasn't severely limited by the inadequate infrastructure I built it with. When I bought 16 years of data, 2TB compressed to its most efficient binary representation, I thought I could use a traditional database like MongoDB to store and load the option chains. It's way too slow. So here's where I've ended up this past week:
It was time to rip off the bandaid and rebuild some performance infrastructure (the database and decision stack) that was seriously holding me back from testing the project properly. Using MongoDB, which has to pack and unpack data up and down the 7 layer OSI model, it took an hour to test one model for one year. I need to test millions of models for 16 years, thousands of times over.
I knew how to do that, so instead of focusing on keeping things stable so I could show you guys some pretty graphs n shit, I broke down the beast and started rebuilding with a pure memory caching approach that will load the options chains thousands of times faster than MongoDB queries. And instead of running one model, one decision layer at a time on the CPU, the new GPU accelerated decision stack design will let me run hundreds of decision layers on millions of models in a handful of milliseconds. Many, many orders of magnitude better performance, and I can finally make the project as powerful as it was supposed to be.
I'm confident that with these upgrades, I'll be able to hit the goal of 60% consistent returns per year. I'll work this goddamn problem for a year if I have to. I have, in the process of trying to become an entrepreneur, planned project after project and given up half way through when it got too hard, or a partner quit, or someone else launched something better. I will not give up on this one, if it takes the rest of the year or five more.
But I don't think it'll come to that. Even with the 20% I've already achieved, if I can demonstrate that in live trading, that's already really good, so there's not really any risk of real failure at this point. But I will, regardless, finish developing the vision I have for Retard Bot and Bidrate Renaissance before I'm satisfied.

Tl;Dr

https://preview.redd.it/0plnnpkw5um51.png?width=3840&format=png&auto=webp&s=338edc893f4faadffabb5418772c9b250f488336
submitted by o_ohi to retard_bot [link] [comments]

Hot Tub Hawk And The Pissed Off Colonel

Well! Here we are again. Everyone is sitting around this internet campfire, anxiously awaiting another Hawk story. Some of you are making S'mores. Others have crammed a stick into a hotdog and are now roasting it. I "Cope" with life and have a fat dip in. The only person I don't see is Hawk. Wait. There he is, and he keeps sticking his fingers into the fire to, "make sure it's still hot." I wonder if there is still a need to detail how mentally deficient or completely oblivious Hawk is? I strongly encourage you to read my previous stories if you have not been formally introduced to Hawk. I suspect you will continue to read anyways, so I offer you this: Hawk is the type of guy that gets into a spelling argument with his tattoo artist and walks out proud of his two-inch sized font forehead tattoo that reads "No Regerts."
We were in beautiful Iraq, a charming vacation destination for thousands of Americans. The vacation was all inclusive. The local women dressed like Pac-Man ghosts or ninjas, and countryside smelled like raw sewage and regret. Most of the locals were very hospitable, but some of the locals had a very strong desire to shout, "Praise Allah" while simultaneously trying to kill us. I am not bothered by much. Every human is entitled to their beliefs. We are also entitled to our own opinions. For example, I don't personally feel "man-dresses" and flip-flops are suitable combat attire, but who am I too judge? The only time I have an issue with people is when they are actively trying to kill me. I don't know why, but it really pisses me off. That and grape jelly.
We worked out of two different locations during this deployment. The majority of my Battalion worked out of a medium-sized Forward Operating Base (FOB), but we also operated out of a smaller FOB. We typically stayed at this other location for about ten days, and would rotate with another Platoon. The location was not horrible, but I personally hated the transient lifestyle. We lived out of our ruck-sacks, and had to find ways to occupy our time when we were not conducting raids or other missions. We didn't have the luxuries we had at "home." There were no gaming systems or large televisions. We simply had find ways to occupy ourselves.
Football was the game of choice for a couple weeks, then it got blacklisted. It had nothing to do with the ball being pigskin either. It was mostly due to poor mission analysis. Football was one of the few things we could all do and actually enjoyed, until it was too dark to play. We had a brilliant and genius idea. We fucking "own the night" with our Night Vision Goggle (NVGs), so why don't we rent it for a couple hours to finish the game? Game on Garth! We thought of everything. We drenched that infidel ball in Infrared (IR) chemlight (Glow Stick) juice. The depth perception problem was immediately evident. House took a fucking laser beam pass to the to the face. Two black eyes builds character though.
We can work through it though. His NVGs were still Fully Mission Capable (FMC), and we all realized that we needed to be a bit quicker. The fourth play from scrimmage was undoubtedly the best, and worst football play in the history of Iraq football. Fuck punting. We were going for it. It would have been easy to confuse Tony, our quarterback for Michael Vick from the shotgun. Tony was a Michael Vick with NVGs, and without the dog fighting felony. Tony evaded numerous rushers and then superbly delivered a fifty yard completion to Ryan. It was beautiful to watch, until it wasn't. NVG's are great, but they don't offer the same Field of View (FOV) your eye-nuggets offer. Ryan thought he was all alone and started a leisurely stroll to the end-zone. The he got fucking nuked from the top and bottom, in fucking reverse directions. Sure, Ryan broke a finger and required "some" stitches. Oh and they broke three sets of NVGs in one play, but damn that was a glorious fucking hit. It was first-and-ten, but our Platoon Sergeant was less than happy. Game off Wayne!
We were now bored again. There was another unit on the FOB with us, but they were not fans of us. The only real interaction we had was when their full-bird Colonel told us to, "stay the fuck away from his Soldiers." I don't know if one of the other Platoons ruined it for us, but the guy was just a complete prick to us.
We did our best to keep our reverse schedule, but it was just so boring during the evenings we were not working. The majority of us resorted to playing Spades or Echure, and others read. Hawk and a handful of others would take nightly showers and then seemed to vanish. "Knowledge is power" and I knew Hawk was utterly powerless. I knew better than to ever let that retarded bird spread his wings and fly solo. I didn't see any reason to worry though. The other people Hawk was with were far smarter than Hawk woud ever be. Furthermore, with football now off the table, there was really no way for anyone to get in trouble at this FOB.
Imagine Hawk in a cattle chute. If I put a box labeled "commonsense" on the opposite end, Hawk would never fucking find it. In a place he literally has no option but to find it, he would NOT FIND IT. EVER. However, if I had a box labeled "worst decision ever" and dropped it in the ocean, Hawk would fucking somehow stumble upon the lost city of Atlantis. I had never really got my ass chewed before I became Hawk's leader, but that trend went out the window when I inherited him.
We lived on the second floor, and my bunk was closest to the door that rotation. Thankfully too. I was woken up when I heard, "I want to talk to one of your leaders." I didn't know "who" was in trouble, but I had Hawk so I knew it was best to simply put my shoes on and assume I was in trouble by proxy. I didn't even wait to see if I would get to sit on the Green Army Weenie, I just spit in my hand and readied my o-ring for maximal insertion. It was too early for the sun to even be out, and I was already willingly walking to my execution. My how things had changed so quickly.
I walk outside and I see five Soldiers, one Hawk, and a fucking pissed of Colonel (COL).
COL: Are you their leader?
OP: I am one of them. How can I help you Sir?
COL: Do you know where I caught them?
This is where I would typically say something stupid, but this guy didn't look happy, and I didn't want to give him a reason to wake up someone who "may" have gave a shit as to why he was irate.
OP: No Sir. I don't.
COL: Above MY SHOWER?
I was now pissed. There was a large shower tent in the middle of large open courtyard. One half was male and the other was female. These fucking morons were spying on naked females? I want to kill them for listening to Hawk. Well, I assumed it was a Hawk idea. Like Hawk's brain, I was putting the cart before the horse. I assume it was Hawk, but I had questions.
OP: How in the fuck did you guys get on top the shower tent?
I was working myself into a frenzy. My brain does not operate like normal people brains. I was pretty pissed considering they violated the privacy of the beautiful ladies at the FOB, but I was actually more pissed they got on top of a fucking tent. They seemingly forgot everything about military tactics and got caught; that was the foremost reason for my anger. The spying on deployment 1's (binary thingy) was second. Considerably a far worse offense, but second at the point in time.
COL: NO. Not the shower tent. On my personal shower.
What? This guy was so special, he had a personal shower. What, he was too good to use the pallet floored showers like the rest of us? So maybe the Romanians (We think anyways) occasionally shit on the pallets and waffle-stomped the poop through the pallets, but the water pressure was phenomenal.
OP: You have a personal shower Sir, and they were on top?
COL: YES. I caught them in my water tank.
Well, back to being puzzled. I don't judge. I personally don't care if penis gazing is your hobby, but there are five of you? Why don't you just unleash your hogs and stare at each others? Anyways, how in the fuck did they all fit into the water tank? What the fuck did they do when they got inside? My god, my brain was running wild with unsightly pictures.
OP: My apologies Sir, but how did they all fit into your water tank?
COL: Come with my Sergeant; so you understand what I am talking about.
OP: You mother fuckers can wait for me in, the front-leaning-rest (Push-up position).
I still wasn't certain I entirely cared, but I thought this would may demonstrate that I showed concern about his fucking one-person shower. COL Prick then lead me around the side of the building and showed me his water tank. It was fucking huge. It was one of the typical hard plastic tanks, but the entire top had been cut off. God knows why, not like it was ever dusty in Iraq, but the top was no-more. It all made sense now. They weren't gay; they were chilling in a makeshift hot tub! Well, the gayness thing is up in the air, but I guess they were too loud while he was showering!?! I apologized profusely, but COL Prick had me locked up at the position of attention for at least ten minutes just dressing me down. I was a "really poor leader, and you're not going to go anywhere in the Army." Jokes on him, they haven't kicked me out yet.
COL: This is why nobody likes "cool guys." Words, words, words. You'd better do something about this, words, words, words. My penis is too small to shower with the big boys, words, words, words. NOW GET THE FUCK OUT OF MY SIGHT.
I returned to the Soldiers, whom were still all in the front-leaning-rest. I screamed, "GET ON THE OTHER SIDE OF THE BUILDING. I DON'T WANT TO GO TO JAIL AFTER PEOPLE SEE ME SMOKE THE FUCKING LIFE FROM YOUR BODY. NOW FUCKING RUN." They fucking scurry, and I stroll to the other side of the building. Out of sight and out of mind.
(I will use "Group" unless Hawk is the person talking. Too many useless names otherwise.)
OP: That fucking dickhead has his own fucking shower! What the fuck?
GROUP: I know right?
OP: What the fuck were you guys thinking? I would expect this from at least one of you, but I won't point elbows. (I then just fucking stare at Hawk.)
GROUP: We didn't think anyone used it. We had never seen anyone go into the room, and the room looked empty. We saw the water tank on top, and just figured we would check it out.
OP: How the fuck did you even get up there?
GROUP: You can walk to it if you exit any second floor window on our building. Well, the courtyard side.
OP: So you guys just sneak out and hang out in this guys shower water?
GROUP: Yes, but we seriously thought nobody used it. We would not have used it otherwise.
OP:You fucking dip-shits think this was just a randomly placed unused water tank? You fucking idiots just stand in this guys shower water for hours?
HAWK: No. We are not dumb Sergeant. We sit on MRE (Meal Ready to Eat) boxes.
OP: HOW LONG HAS THIS BEEN GOING ON?
GROUP: (LaughteGiggles) Every night!?!
OP: We have been here for five days now! NO FUCKING MORE! I will fucking kill you if I get yelled at again over this. The only thing that makes me smile is the fact that he is showering with your ball funk.
Hawk: I have some excellent news then Sergeant
OP: Really? Whats Hawk?
Hawk: (Smirk) We made a promise that, "nobody pisses in the hot tub"...
OP: This is why your mother should have swallowed you Hawk. Why the fuck would that make me happy?
Hawk: (Laughing) Because I broke that rule every night. Most nights more than once!
GROUP: What the fuck Hawk! We have been lounging in your piss? What the fuck dude!
Hawk: I know. (Smiles.) I lied to you though! Cheer up Sergeant. I peed on him for you!
For the record, Hawk did not find the hot tub. He just peed in it, a lot. I don't think any of us paid attention because they came back from wet and with towels. I merely assumed they went to the showers. I suppose I should have kept better track of time. Also, I apologize if this was not as funny as the other Hawk tales. I realized it when I reread it, but it was certainly funny being on-the-ground and witnessing it. Can't laugh at them all I suppose. Remember, next week, "Hawk Walks Home: In Iraq." I don't think it is feasibly possible to not make that one funny. Lastly, some of my stories are a result of me being in the military, but not military. Those stories and others will/are posted at FuckeryUniveristy. I am not ever going to compete with this page, but I do need a place to post other stories and have little fear they will be taken down. The mod may be a huge prick, but at least I know the guy. Man...huge prick!
Cheers!
submitted by SloppyEyeScream to FuckeryUniveristy [link] [comments]

The truth about algo-trading

Just to give you guys a realistic perspective of what a project like Retard Bot really is up against, and the difficulty of printing free money...
This shit is really really really realy hard. I've been coding every day non-stop for three (four?) months, spent $4K on data and drives to store backups of it, plus another $3K+ on the beast of a PC you need to process so much data, and I'll need to spend another $8-12K on buying more PCs to basically create a tiny supercompute cluster for RB to process machine learning. I'm 26,000 lines of code into this and probably half way done.
You have to be prepared to code your own ultra fast localized GPU accelerated database that outperforms everything else because traditional databases are way too slow to crunch through this much historical data the hundreds of millions of times needed to train the machine.
If you hope to have any chance of succeeding "taming the beast" you have to be an actual autist, obsessed with problem solving to the point of doing it months on end without stepping outside. They hire the most glorious cases of asperger genius autist godlords who never leave the basement except when their minifridge runs out of mtn dew and they have to go put more on mom's grocery list. The autists that figure this shit out are the type that squeal REEEE bc they've had too much human interaction when they see the mailman walk past a fucking window.
As someone once told me, you're up against companies that blow holes in the sides of mountains to route their fiber optic cables on a little shorter of a path so they can access trades with latency a tiny fraction of a millisecond faster than the next autist. Communication at the speed of light is something these quants get annoyed waiting for. Many of these companies waterboard their quants with mtn dew to force harder work, compiling research and IP over decades. These autists are chained to desks in dungeons with a steady drip of cocaine and coffee driving their little binary crunching brains to squeeze out one more hundredth of a percent yearly return.
It's either prove you're a genius or fail with this game. I don't underestimate how unlikely it is that my attempt would work. But I'm crazy enough to try and obsessed enough to follow through. I'm obviously autistic enough to put this much thought into a single post on Reddit... and this is how much I think through everything.
Maybe I can pull it off. The results are looking promising right now but it's too early to say for sure. Just know what you guys are getting into if you're going to try something like this. Sure use it as an opportunity to learn to code, but maybe don't sell your mom into slavery to scrape together the $3-5K you need to buy the historical options data for a project like this. I know what you're thinking. "My mom's worth at least $12K" No she's not. Don't lie to yourself autist. And if you succeed in something like this, don't fucking dance. For every one of us who makes it, 99 others just threw away their mom's retirement fund on PRPL calls.
https://reddit.com/link/i7ybef/video/uexycvg7dfg51/player
submitted by o_ohi to retard_bot [link] [comments]

Raven Reviews: IxSHE Tell Part 1, The Mechanics of a Book.

TL;DR I review the novel without talking about the plot.
A FRIENDLY DISAGREEMENT
Recently I had a discussion with a stranger on a forum who was adamantly apposed to what he called "Harem Games" and novels that featured harem elements. To recount the whole conversation would take pages and wouldn't be entirely relevant to this review but i'd like to summarize two key points he expressed to me that informed his opinion. The first is that Japanese society, and even American society, is not supportive of a man having multiple partners. While I was able to get him to admit that recent years have seen a rise in polyamory in the United States he remained adamant that any form of harem was unrealistic for the culture. Secondly, he expressed an opinion that mechanically and from a game design perspective harem routs were a "copout" because they are very rarely the true route or most naturally feeling resolution to a story and only exist for people who quote "Feel bad for the girls they rejected even though most of the time that would be better for them and they're okay with it!" He would go on to say that Japanese views on romance are incompatible with harems because of their focus on "firsts" and "being someones only" but being someone who is not native Japanese myself and has only experienced their culture through works like the subject of this review I can't say I'm able to talk about that point much. I feel like VNs portray an idealized version of Japanese culture just like American media does and just like I wouldn't say someone who was seen every episode of any three american sitcoms knows American culture I would not say I know Japanese culture from reading VNs.
Out of respect for his privacy I'm not going to name him here but if by some chance you're reading this stranger I spoke to this review will serve as my response to the summery of your points. While I know you're aware I disagree with you, I want to provide a better example then simply listing novels I though were good as I did in our original discussion. As I am well aware however that providing my response like this, if it were to miraculously reach you, is somewhat unfair since you have no good platform to respond with outside of a comment below please feel free to DM me and I will gladly respond. This review will be addressed to a wider audience obviously but I think it will be easy to tell what parts I have drawn from the information you gave me.
"BEST HAIR" CHOICE STRUCTURE
IxSHE Tell is a recently translated romantic comedy about P-kun (Ninomiya Hajime) and his difficult choice between five girls who confess to him one after the other. That plot synopsis may have drawn up some negative connotations for you but I encourage you to judge this story on its own merits because I was also skeptical but pleasantly surprised with the quality of the work presented. The novel is split in three parts. A lengthy prologue that takes somewhere between an hour and two hours to read. A common route of about fifteen hours, and then individual romance paths for each heroine that are about three hours long apiece. This clocks the total novel read time at about thirty hours but I would imagine a fast reader could finish it in twenty if they choose to. My personal time to completion is skewed slightly longer as I'm a masochist who wouldn't feel satisfied without being certain I've seen every possible line of dialog but I can't imagine this novel taking more the forty or forty five hours for the slowest reader. While their are a number of gimmicks in this novel I will discuss below without the H-patch the game makes the bold choice to provide the player with only a single meaningful choice and thereby creates a unique atmosphere I can't say I've ever experienced before.
Anyone who has read more then one or two visual novels will know that commonly the narrative choices are less then open to a reader pursuing more then one heroine. I hesitate to say common structure punishes readers for choosing options favorable to more then one romance route but it certainly discourages it. To explain what I mean lets take a look at a few examples. Muv-Luv, specifically Muv-Luv Extra, has a difficult to unlock "Bad" ending where if the reader favors a specific heroine but fails to choose her options in one of a few specific scenes the game ends abruptly without satisfyingly concluding. Their is also a second "Bad" end which occurs only if the player makes two specific choices, both of which are little more then rejections of the branch path to romance routes. Effectively, failure to fully pursue one of the game's heroines results in the game ending in its second act, but paradoxically while the game has two dozen or so choices any combination of those options will result in a romance route and "good" end so long as the reader chooses the appropriate option at one of the deciding points. IMHHW by contrast has a failure route you can only trigger by selecting one specific option in one specific scene that is obviously the wrong choice and then locks you into a route shortly after. I actually think one of the most enjoyable jokes I can find in a VN is finding the path that lets you spend the least amount of time with a heroine but still puts you on her romance path, then watching as P-kun trips over himself to explain how he fell in love with her instead of the girl he spent most of the last week with. Unfortunately though I can rarely do this without failing out before the final act because of this exact type of choice structure.
Some novels are more subtle about this lack of choice. Katawa Shoujo comes to mind as even at its worse you do have SOME free will to jump ship to a different heroine mid act but the binary choice between Lilly and Shizune never sat well with me and Emi being a one choice lock is just disappointing. While not every novel is blatant enough to go the Muv-Luv route and literally name the heroines in the choices so its impossible to miss who you're siding with its a rare treat to find a novel that doesn't spell out which options are the "right" ones to some degree. This brings me back to IxST because the design choice to make only one choice truly relevant, which I would call a weakness in any other novel, but replacing "Best Hair" choices with a gold star reward system opens the narrative and allows for a more natural and less pressured experience.
REAL CHOICE
This section might not be entirely 100% necessary but I wanted to break down exactly why I think the mechanics of this VN are so revolutionary and vastly superior to the rest of the genre. Honestly, while I know it wouldn't fit every novel I think future VNs would benefit greatly from this example. So the common route in IxST is divided into 5 subsections the novel labels as "days" but are probably better thought of as plot beats. Each subsection allows the reader to assign up to ten "hearts" in any combination to the five girls pursuing P-kun and with one major exception allows this to happen at any time. In the words of the games tutorial paraphrased, if a girl does something you like you can reward her with a heart. You're under no obligation to hand out hearts and can ignore the system all together if you choose but regardless at the end of each plot event you are prompted to select a girl for an extra scene and are then moved to the next plot beat with a new allotment of hearts. At the end of the last subsection if you overwhelmingly favored one girl with hearts over the others P-kun falls for that girl and you have the option to accept her confession. But even at this point you have the option to change your mind and pick another girl who will give you one final pitch about why you should choose them before giving you yet ANOTHER chance to back out and commit to the girl you favored.
Maybe the weight of how much this changes the feel of reading a VN isn't clear so lets do a comparison. Muv-Luv Extra isn't a great novel, certainly not terrible but it's about as average as I could hope to find. Their is no other single VN to me that is as aggressively 5/10 as Muv-Luv Extra. Placing it beside IxST both games have a prologue introducing their respective flavors of P-kun and follow it with an intro movie. I know i'm vastly oversimplifying things as the prologues to these two stories are nothing alike but mechanically they have no difference so the important part is that when the common route starts the reader is mentally in the same place. In IxST the player is almost immediately presented with all the choice mechanic they will be interacting with for the next three or so hours of the novel in the form of the heart system. Muv-Luv by contrast spends its opening to the common route with one of the five heroins and less then half an hour into the experience presents the first choice which is a binary question of if you enjoyed yourself with her. Unless you are brand new to visual novels you will know immediately that Muv-Luv's choice should give you pause because without even letting you meet four of the five romance options you are already having to make a choice that you have no way of knowing the significance of. While not all novels do this it's not uncommon for a visual novel to soft lock out of a route when you don't get every choice for a heroine correct and so this small moment to a first time reader can feel needlessly stressful because choosing one option may lock you on one path for the narrative and the other may permanently lock you out of it without telling you either result for HOURS.
In roughly the same time a reader will make their way through IxST's first section of common route to the extra scene choice that same reader in Muv-Luv will likely have to make two additional choices if not more all of which are binary "Best Hair" choices encouraging the reader to pursue one of the five heroines hours before the common route ends. This almost makes the choices irrelevant as the reader is primed to select whichever option continues the path their on and discourages them from picking the option they would prefer over the option that is more likely to result in a "good" end. Now to be fair IxST does not communicate to the reader that who they pick for the extra scene is not a soft lock but even if we assume the reader is ignoring the hearts and has already selected which romance route they want to shoot for the hearts system tutorial screen and the extra scene tutorial are definitely geared toward the opposite priming. Every girl is available to be chosen no mater how few hearts you gave her and this ties neatly into the games presentation. The cross view system that temporarily takes away the hearts counters and allows the reader to experience short scenes with each girl further primes the reader to the idea that no matter their choice at this stage the narrative will continue without soft locking. To summarize Muv-Luv and its traditional use of choices makes its narrative feel like the choices exist as a quiz of "what would this girl like me to do?" IxST and its heart system feel like you are organically favoring the girl or girls you enjoy and presents everyone with an equal chance for you to grow attached to them.
THE PROBLEM WITH COMMON ROUTES
I have another review in the works explaining why I dislike the presentation of most common routes using IMHHW as an example but I'll summarize my points here so I can explain how much better IxST is at getting a reader to seriously consider all the heroines as potential options then a traditional visual novel. Everyone knows their are certain types of characters that feature heavily in visual novels and to an extent has their preferences. Class Representatives, lolis, little sisters etc are all common starting points for heroines. I personally tend to dislike Tsunderes and have a preference for childhood friends but that's just me. Common routes ideally should follow four basic rules but often fail to uphold them.
1.) The common route should introduce but NOT develop characters only important in one or two romance routes and should involve background characters as much as possible while developing the heroines.
2.) The common route should develop each heroine equally and if possible should provide them with as close to equal screen time as feasible.
3.) The common route should have a reason for existing outside of developing characters and this reason should not be resolved before the romance routes begin unless those routes have their own conflict.
4.) The common route should have just as many CGs as the individual romance routes if not more and showcase each heroine evenly in them.
I came up with these rules because the entire reason a common route exists is to allow the reader to familiarize themselves with the world and characters and specifically the heroines. If it fails to accomplish that then what was the point of having it? IMHHW happens to fail at ALL of these rules but that's a topic for another day. Let me know in the comments if you're interested in that review and I'll push it up the list. However before I explain why IxST does so well by following these guidelines let me explain my reasoning for each.
Rule one recognizes that visual novels need characters other then the protagonist and heroines to feel believable, otherwise the world feels empty and flat. These characters come in three flavors. Background, Side, and Spriteless. Background characters are things like the protagonists best friend or their teacher, definitely important people with a role in the narrative but not romance options. Ideally background characters should be introduced in the prologue to establish their personality and due to their development typically remaining static involved as much as possible with the character in the common route so that by the time the romance routes are reached they can serve their narrative purpose without taking away from the heroine. We should know everything important about them before the half way mark so they can be used and referenced easily as needed. A perfect example is Mikoto in Muv-Luv Extra, who is introduced about a quarter of the way through the game and has basically finished his development by the half way point. Side characters are the opposite, and should be developed in romance routes after being introduced in the common route. A good example here is if a heroine has a little sister, although not every little sister character is like this in general this example works. Ideally, the reader should know the heroine has a little sister and be introduced to her sprite but this is only to allow her to be expanded on in the romance route later so that each run of the game feels unique. Just like in real life growing closer to people means your circle of friends shifts and its more interesting to a reader to have to work to know every character in the game then to always have that information from the beginning. The last category of Spriteless are small time or single use characters that well, don't have a sprite. I might come back in a future review and talk about this group but they don't bear much relevance to the current topic so I'm going to move on.
The second rule is pretty self explanatory but to be thorough one of the greatest sins a common route can commit is focusing on one character over the others. Yes, I am aware that some novels have "true" ends that are meant to advance a larger story. Yes, I am also aware that in real life it is very unlikely people you only see at school or work or whatever will have an equal amount of exposure to you as people you've been friends with for years or who you have class with. None of those things matter in a novel. The author has the ability to portray each character evenly even if the protagonist does not have an even amount of interaction with each character. The thing about real life and realism is that life is often incredibly boring. I have yet to see a novel that forced me to sit through every class period the protagonist experienced, because that would be excruciating. I also don't have to wait six hours for the protagonist to wake up after going to sleep nor witness every bite of breakfast every day. This isn't a question of what is realistic this is a question of allowing the reader to get a decent understanding of the characters. This doesn't always mean they are given literally to the second the same amount of dialogue and screen time, but a good common route will let each heroine have an equal time to shine without favoring any of them.
The third rule is the one I most often see broken and as such has become my personal most important of the four. I am far more willing to forgive a novel that can follow this rule, even if it isn't for every run, then i am a novel that can not. I have no problems with slice of life narratives. It can sometimes be incredibly cathartic to just drop into the shoes of someone else and pretend to be them for a day. But stories do not exist without conflict and no, choosing which girl you like is not sufficient conflict for the story unless the protagonist is just as concerned about it as you are. Ideally, a novel's conflict should involve all the characters though that's rather difficult so settling for just the protagonist and heroins is fine. The conflict should also have enough leeway to be solved in multiple ways so that each heroines route can provide their own solution. How a heroine uniquely resolves conflict or avoids it is a huge opportunity to squander by ignoring the inclusion of a story.
The fourth rule is most concerned with creating a balanced feeling to the novel and has less to do with the common route specifically then it does with the novel as a whole but I tend to include it here because well, it just makes since. Obviously the romance routes are going to have a higher density of CGs then the common route. If you include extra scenes and optional scenes as part of a heroine's run rather then common route content that rule is doubly true. However this doesn't mean that the common route is totally devoid of CGs because that is obviously not the case. Most VNs use the prologue as an excuse to give each heroine an opening CG but the common route is where the majority of group shots and for lack of a better term "casual" scenes allow the artists to showcase each heroine outside of their static sprites. If you've read the other rules explanations you may have noticed that I haven't elaborated on the notion that the common route's main goal is to make the heroine's interesting to the reader and I've saved that point for this moment because outside of their sprites, which are a vital part of a heroine's ability to express themselves, CGs are the most important facet to letting these characters "breath." If you've ever listened to the dialogue in a visual novel without looking at the screen (Admittedly you'd have to know at least a bit of Japanese to do this but lets just assume you have the bare minimum understanding of what the characters are saying.) its actually really hard to distinguish each heroine's personality purely off the words they say. Maybe we don't often think about it but this genre is not just tied to its visual element it is at this point utterly undivorcable from it because it has come to rely on tropes and ideas that repeat themselves so often they tend to blur. How many visual novels have heroines that are constantly getting "shy" or "flustered?" How many use the same literal words like Segoi, Baka, Hentii, to describe things? Language is both endlessly expressive and limiting and even the best VNs, perhaps ESPECIALLY the best, would make TERRIBLE novels if they were printed as is in the form of a paperback. The entire reason for CGs even existing is to play off established tropes and the story to give the reader a snapshot of why the moment they are currently reading is significant and unique, and in a romance novel that more often then not translates to why the heroine is significant and unique. Neglecting this visual element therefore is a huge disservice to the the reader.
MERGING THE IDEAS
Having said all that IxST uses its unique choice system to facilitate a change in the reader's approach to reading and thus makes itself vastly more enjoyable. This novel could have so easily been nothing more then a self insert fantasy about being pursued by multiple women but because it encourages you to engage with every line of dialogue and spread your focus between all of the characters the story feels fresh and different. The last major choice mechanic I have to mention in IxST, the cross view system, is the epitome of this because while I do have problems with some of the scenes I'll talk about in part 2 of this review the fact it's the only time you can't access the hearts menu was a stroke of genius.
Cross view occurrences are once per subsection of the common route and present you with six to nine short scenes involving characters not in P-kun's immediate vicinity talking about or thinking about him. Their is always one scene for each of the heroines but most of the background characters get one each go around as well as usually a scene from the perspective of a random nameless classmate. These scenes are 100% optional but choosing not to read them is a real disservice because letting yourself get into the mindset of the heroins and characters really fleshes out their actions and puts context to the events that happen toward the end of each subsection. I think you'd really miss out if you skipped them. What elevates them for me though is the fact that since you can't access the hearts menu you're forced to think about the scenes for a longer period of time before immediately rewarding the heroines with a heart. By the time you get the menu back you may feel compelled to hand out two or three of your ten points and that choice is a really good moment to sit and consider how you actually feel about each of the characters. If you haven't been interested in one of the girls but their inner thoughts persuaded you they mean well or vise versa then these moments of returned choice can really shake up who you favor for the eventual act three. It feels like i'm praising this game for taking away my options during these sections, because I am, but that's only because you have such freedom everywhere else you become hyper aware and observant when it's scaled back.
Going back to the common route rules above this altered mindset falls perfectly in line with fulfilling those goals. Because the reader also cross views background characters to get their perspective they get to relegate development in the main story away from interactions with the protagonist and still fulfill the requirement they be showcased. Because each heroine always has a cross fade section each of them gets a roughly equal amount of time to win over a reader and because they have this extra time they can have more interesting personal conflicts that carry over to their romance routes while the main plot focuses on P-kun's struggles.
A RESPONSE TO A DIFFERENT POINT
I want to wrap up this first part of my review by addressing why I think "harem" games are uniquely suited to have better, more developed experiences then equal surface quality novels. IxST would not have worked as a story if the protagonist had been the one to confess to the heroines. I don't mean it would have just been different I mean the structure of this game and what made it so interesting and special would have been worthless if that one detail were changed. The choice system of IxST only works because all options are treated equally and never pull the reader too far in one direction. The mindset of someone who is balancing a relationship with five people is fundamentally different from pursuing one out of five. I can't make it any clearer then that, reading this VN is just fundamentally different because the atmosphere is different.
Am I saying ALL harem games are like this? Absolutely not. Especially those that have the harem route as an option but clearly do not focus on it or worse work like Harem Party where harem means nothing more then the Echii scenes keep changing girls. But I am saying its easier to break out of the mindset visual novels often fall into where you can only pursue one girl at a time and regardless of what the context of the situation is you should always pick the option that girl will like or be punished for it. The quote that really stuck with me from my conversation referenced in the intro above was "I can never get invested in the characters because they treat everyone the same."
I didn't say it at the time but isn't that a good thing? Do you WANT the characters to be inherently unequal? Everyone has their kinks and this is a kinky kinky genre you're allowed to pick favorites based upon what you like but doesn't it stand to reason that if you're reading a novel and one character is favored over another that the person who likes that unfavored character is going to wish they had been treated more equally? That's to say nothing about the fact that every novel is someones first and if a brand new VN reader gets hold of this story don't you want them to have a fair representation of the different character types? Isn't the entire point of having options to be able to explore them unbiased? If you really wanted to pursue just one type of character then their are dozens of novels with only one heroine, admittedly far less then their are with several choices but it's not like they don't exist! Now if the novel is poorly written and the characters have to all share two or three personality traits then yeah fine you have a point there but that's not the harems fault that's just a bad novel in general.
I can't say I'm a "fan" of harem VNs, I think I own maybe five total that could even plausibly count out of a sizable collection but I can't deny that problems I constantly complain about in other VNs are at worse absent in the sub-genre and at worst have active solutions like in IxST that I feel NEED to be praised. I don't feel comfortable writing off these stories because "One man can't possibly satisfy five girls." His words not mine.
WHY I CHOOSE TO SPLIT THIS REVIEW
Well for starters i'm already going far over what I think is reasonable for a single post and haven't even TOUCHED on the actual game's story but more importantly I think my opinion on the VN itself and the mechanics of the game are two separate things. I'll be clear and say I do like IxST, in fact it might crack my top 15, but I have a lot more to say about its narrative then I do about this topic so I decided it would be best to segregate the two ideas. Next week I'll be posting my views on the story, characters, music, art, and my overall opinion with a few extras thrown in. I expect it will end up being even longer then part 1 so be prepared for that I guess. I'm interested to see which of these two parts do better overall so if you liked what you read consider showing some support. I'll consider your updoot to be a substitute for a heart. This is my fourth review in this series so I'm still full of ideas but if these longer reviews do well I might consider moving to a slower release schedule to be sure I can be more detailed. Let me know what you think and if you agree with my points or the stranger I argued against. Stay well everyone!
submitted by OneSilverRaven to visualnovels [link] [comments]

Where do Naughty Dog go from here?

I have to admit, I am a lot of a Naughty Dog fanboy. In terms of hours played, Uncharted is almost certainly my favorite franchise (although none of those games are my absolute favorite of all time).
I also love PlayStation. I work all day in front of a computer, so the very last thing I want is to play PC games. Flopping onto my sofa and firing up the PS3/PS4 is just bliss after a hard day's work. I don't necessarily hate XBox, but I was staying at my brother's house a few years ago, and the Internet went down. I thought I would play some XBox while I waited for the Internet to come back online and it literally wouldn't let me play any games without an Internet connection. I know Xbox doesn't do that these days but since I generally despise Microsoft anyway, it was enough for me to abandon their console forever.
I'm afraid this whole episode concerning TLOUII has left a very bad taste in my mouth. This includes Sony and Naughty Dog. I'm seriously considering not buying a PS5 and giving up gaming, if this is how they are going to carry on.
The false advertising, the DMCA takedowns, the obvious shilling by the legacy gaming press. It all adds up to a very bad picture.
Not to mention virtue signalling "#BlackLivesMatter" whilst buying cobalt from mines which literally use black children in near-slavery conditions in the "Democratic Republic" of the Congo . It's disgusting.
I despise the "culture war" and so much of what Sony is doing these days is just a disaster. I don't want this shit in my games. I'm not homophobic - I enjoyed TLOU DLC and I play Bioware games and like them too, to give two examples. I just don't want current-year politics in my video games.
I also want the worlds my games are set in to be logically consistent.
For example, Abby makes no sense. I work out. To get to the size I want to be, I have to spend two-three hours a day working out, eat 6,000+ calories a day, take a load of natural supplements (I don't use steroids or anything like that) and sleep for nine hours when I go to bed.
Even given the abundance of resources we enjoy in our society, doing this is extremely difficult. I can only do this for a few weeks at a time because life gets in the way and I am not a professional athlete. The idea that Abby can do this in an environment where there are no resources and every minute has to be spent foraging to survive is absolutely ridiculous.
Additionally, Sony censoring third-party games ("sexuality", but non-nudity in Anime games (cartoons, FFS) - I don't play these games and have no interest in them, but I 100% defend the right of gamers who do like these titles to experience them as the developers created them), yet allowing the extremely violent TLOUII, replete with an anal sex scene, is just ridiculous.
Many of us knew that Sony moving its HQ to California was going to end up a disaster and here we are.
I know that some people felt that Uncharted: The Last Legacy was a "woke" mess, but I don't feel that way, I genuinely thought that game was amazing. In fact, I think it's my second favorite Uncharted game, after Uncharted 2.
I really want ND to succeed and continue to bring us amazing games. However, I don't believe this is a possibility anymore. Between Druckmann and Sony, I think we are going to be saddled with woke BS going forward.
Let me be clear, I only played TLOUI because my brother wanted to play it as our shared "Christmas Game". This is where (before he got married) we would choose a game to play for the Christmas Holiday and take turns to play.
I hate zombie games, and with the exception of Horizon Zero Dawn and Death Stranding, I'm not a fan of the post-apocalyptic genre either, unless it can offer something genuinely new, which I think those two titles did.
I did appreciate the game for the cordyceps infection - it was something in nature I knew about before and I thought it was genius to incorporate it. I also found the story to be excellent, however, TLOU is a game that I have never replayed, unlike all the Uncharted games that I have completed and Platinumed at least twice (except Last legacy).
I am not really bothered about TLOU that much. I liked it as a one-off experience, but I thought the actual gameplay was boring. I know the story, so I don't really care to play the game ever again, as I know what happens.
To be honest, PS4 has been quite a disappointment - I have spent the lockdown playing mostly PS3 games that I never played before, and have played some absolute classics - Binary Domain, Prince of Persia: The Forgotten Sands, Spec Ops: The Line, Lord of the Rings: War in the North (this game is AMAZING - if you have a PS3 please look at it) and on PS4, the LA Noire remastered game, to name but a few.
What characterizes these games is that they are FUN to play. Druckmann says "we don't talk about fun". I'm sorry, then what the F- is the point? While everyone was saying how un-fun TLOUII was, I was literally laughing every five seconds playing LA Noire, which is a dark game, but is also hilarious and a heap of fun at the same time.
LA Noire PS4 has a 76 score on Metacritic. Is it truly reasonable to say that game is worse than TLOUII?
I don't think so.
Anyway, I hope you get an idea of where I am coming from in this very long preamble.
My questions for you are:
- Uncharted is likely dead - can it be revived? I would like to see a dedicated PS4 (and therefore PS5) remake of Uncharted: Golden Abyss, which would remove all the Vita -specific controls and bring back dedicated treasures. Get Bluepoint to do this. Obviously, this doesn't inject any new Nathan Drake, it's canon. This would at least win back some trust among fans. Do you agree?
- Beyond that, can anything be done with Uncharted? Is it, after that, dead? Would a game with Cutter appease fans?
- TLOU - In my opinion, this franchise didn't need to be a franchise. I don't think this game needed a sequel. Joel and Ellie's tale was told, and when I first heard that TLOUII was a thing, I genuinely thought it was a terrible idea. Unless you were going to tell a different story in the world they created, it just felt like a bad idea to me. I have the same concerns regarding the Horizon Zero Dawn sequel - I just don't know if you can write a sequel as good as the first one, and maybe it should be another story from a different perspective, e.g. set in another continent.
- Are 100% linear games now dead? It seems to me that TLOUII - despite the abysmal plot and writing, could probably have redeemed itself somewhat if the player at least had agency: punishing players for "choices" they were forced into is bollocks. At least Spec Ops: The Line gave you a binary option, and even if both options were horrible, at least the game had a reason to make you live with the consequences of what you chose. Telling the player they are bad people for doing things the game MADE them do is just bad writing.
- What does ND do next? - As above, the low hanging fruit would be a remaster of Golden Abyss, which they don't even need to do themselves. But without Uncharted, and presumably with TLOU also being a dead IP, can they survive?
Do they move away from linear games into a more open world RPG-type genre (BTW, I absolutely HATE the "open world" sections in Uncharted 4 and Last Legacy - I assume TLOUII is the same - either make your games open sandbox/open world with fast travel and all the normal open world stuff, or just don't bother. The ND versions I have played are tedious and painful.
I would be very interested to hear what you have to say. This sub seems to be quite open minded and I didn't know where else to put this.
Tldr; I am a massive ND and Sony fan, but their recent behaviour has me questioning my loyalty going forward. What on Earth do Naughty Dog do going forward, given that their two major IPs from the last decade or so are now effectively dead?
submitted by geraltshairclip to TheLastOfUs2 [link] [comments]

The Red Prince ruined the game for me and here's why

I felt the need to talk about this because this one single character ruined the experience the game offered for me. No one else seems to talk about the many logical inconsistencies in his backstory, ingame character and his questline and that really bothers me.
He's a genius diplomat despite being delusional, unwise and a total arrogant cunt. Genius general despite never leaving his palace. Genius swordsman because he might as well be at this point. He has built up all this notoritery, won all of his wars, from his couch. The world salivates over him despite all his negative traits, if it sounds like I'm describing a Mary Sue then I very well might be.
He summoned demons to entertain himself, for whatever reason they considered him their "equal" and didn't kill him. He says the boredom that caused this was because he lacked challenge, and not because he is a spoiled brat. A succubus who owes the Shadow Prince attacks him, he manages to kill her despite being overpowered because "Source magic". There's a contradiction in this story. He states that he needed to use Source to summon demons. On the other hand, he killed the succubus with Source magic as well and he said he didn't know he had that power. The Shadow Prince later states that this is when they found out that he is a godwoken, which implies his first use of Source ever as the Shadow Prince was keeping an eye on him all the time.
To quote him:
"Miraculous what a Sourcerer can do with a little arcane lore."
followed up with:
"Something deep inside me welled up: a power I never knew I had."
He is exiled afterwards and despite many attempts on his life he survives in a hostile political climate where people would likely love to lynch him. The methods of slavery the lizard empire uses are blatantly cruel. He is pro-slavery. I sincerely doubt people who live under the fear of being enslaved by the empire he used to rule would be amused by his casual suggestions that they become enslaved to him.
When Act 2 starts, with almost every conversation with him, you will only get binary choices.
During the first meeting with the Red Princess, the only choices given to you are denying the event because you sense an ambush or allowing it. Denying it will result in the prince spitting on you and leaving despite the fact that your character is right about you getting ambushed regardless of which choice you choose. Consider the fact that he is a genius tactician, standing in a prime ambush spot, ready to sacrifice you and your party just to bang his destined lover. The thing is, even if you don't do this part of his questline because you know the outcome, he will still know Sadha's name later despite them never meeting, and he will be just as much in love with her as if you did the quest.
His character loses his composure and confidence if you are romancing him and you confront him about the way he treats you, or the fact that he's cheating on his lover with you or cheating on you with his lover. This is a love triangle, not polyamorous because in a poly relationship people live together as a family where everyone is loved. Sadha dislikes your character from the start. This indecisiveness ends with the relationship not having a closure, except if you let him ascend to godhood. He'll then tell you that he is intent on cheating on Sadha because "Gods have a rather large appetite". It is also implied that he is intent on bringing more people into the romance-pile.
To quote him:
"Remember all those dalliance filled myths... Yes... I think I'll be creating many a myth myself."
Sadha herself feels like she is manipulating him from the start. Many of her quotes suggest she's power hungry, and she is ready to send her own children to fight the gods. She is hellbent on this. I never thought I'd see a mother so ready to send their children to war, literal baby dragons. The Red Prince is not sure about her decision but YOU convince him about it quite easily.
To quote the only two INSANE choices given to you:
"Urge him to accept! Dragons are his destiny. Let him proudly show it!"
"Say these eggs should be destroyed! They're a danger to this world!"
Imagine telling a father and a mother that their children are dangerous and should be killed. Imagine saying that they should send their newborn babies to murder people. After this, the prince will mention that he will raise his children to be "wise", something that is hard to take seriously because of the events before. I'm saying it again, your character is going to weaponize children or be hellbent on murdering them. Your only two choices. People are okay with this, and Larian got away with this as well, I see no one ever mention this.
During his questline, you have to fight many assassins, including the Shadow Prince, his nemesis. He is completely dismissive about this. He even calls his arch-enemy a coward. Many of your choices about dialogue regarding assassins before the confrontation with the Shadow Prince end with either kissing his ass or being unreasonably hostile. I didn't see any pragmatic choices.
In my opinion, the Shadow Prince would have posed more of a threat to him if they make him even more competent and cunning. The notoritery the Red Prince built up could all be the doing of a very competent shadow government that recognized that he is not a competent ruler at the time, while also posing the danger of the revival of dragons. His entire life could have been a lie, which would probably end up changing his character as it's built entirely on his pride.
The glaring problem here however, is that he doesn't have anyone he considers an enemy, his ONLY real enemy is the player or the God King. It's a ludonarrative dissonance because while in gameplay you can beat him, in his story the game considers him to be way stronger than you. Conflicts in his story end up as a nuisance instead of something that develops/explores character or interesting topics.
As you can see here, many potential conflicts or character development possibilities are set up, they are left unused however. The Chekhov's Gun Principle dictates that false promises or irrelevant story elements should never come into play. If he is shown being able to introspect, then his character should develop more than simply "respecting your character". His character reached the level Ifan started from, it's nothing special. He never does anything out of selflessness for you, never sacrifices anything. The only gesture you get is a hug. Actions matter more than words.
People like him because of his sass, confidence and exotic race. This is why I refer to him as a conman. He lacks depth and his character desperately needs it. He feels artificial, like he's not a real person.
Player agency and narrator:
As I mentioned before, the entire world is salivating over him. The narrator himself describes how you feel about him, which should be entirely player choice. It all feels like he is the main character instead of the player character, who is the actual protagonist of the story. You are relegated to a spectator role, your only options most of the time are binary choices. No room for argument and debate, which would be great because of how preachy he is about power for example. He is dismissive if you try to go with the potentially argumentative choice given to you when it's a serious topic about him.
Romance:
This is the worst romance story I've seen yet. I don't understand why it's even present in the game.
It starts off with voyeurism. You have to watch him have sex with the love of his life. He'll notice you of course and will grab you by your clothes and lift you up. You get to mention that his "little prince" is standing proud, while also getting the option to a jealousy confession. Any player who finds the choice of romance start insulting is justified feeling that way.
His romance scene has him talk about Sadha at it's start, the talk has no real closure as he dodges and shifts the responsibility right away. You get to bang him or not, binary choices again, you are not able to call him out on his behaviour. The choices given to you for the climax, compared to what any other origin character gets are minimal. You get to choose him to be gentle, rough or romantic. It's you deciding how he acts and not you acting. Other origin characters give you an option for a more active role compared to this, it's a nice thing since all the characters are playersexual, blank slates. Homosexual relationships however have a different psychology compared to heterosexual ones, topping and bottoming could be important and they could be hinted at. The problem is, if you let the player choose an active or passive role with one companion, then you should do it with all the other ones as well.
The rampant cuckoldry without any nuance to it makes it really, really bad. The fact that they are doubling down on it if he becomes a god feels like insanity. Along with sending his children to war or suggesting to kill them.
Conclusion:
I wish the writers would treat the player with more respect. I've grown more and more depressed writing this because of how cheated I felt by the end when I analyzed this character completely. The only reason I decided to write this at all is because I noticed how strong the people's feelings are about The Last of Us 2 characters. The emotions I get from this game is similar to that. I was ready to connect to the game's world and it's characters, yet I was unable to.
After spending 150 hours, both completionist playthroughs I ended up disliking this game with passion. I was bored by the combat, which has been analyzed to hell with it's problems already. I felt disconnected from the world because it kept reminding me that it's a game. Gaining power for power's sake, cynicism everywhere, mass graves and tragedies all around and the game itself encouraging me to care more about killing people for XP.
DOS2 is essentially a combat centric game, similar to XCOM, pretending to be an RPG. They wish to go down the XCOM route as well, evidence to it is the Divinity: Fallen Heroes game that was put on hold because of Baldur's Gate 3. Dialogue, characters are a filler content in between combat encounters. This is why it feels suspicious to me when critics of this game on YouTube mostly end up describing and analyzing the combat and they just say superficial things about the writing. Without any examples or problems other than the tonal shifts.
There was an interview when Swen talked about how they listen to criticism, yet when he mentioned that people say that the writing isn't cohesive, he doesn't agree with it. He basically dodges the topic afterwards, talking about gameplay instead. If you are curious about it, the interview is a Baldur's Gate 3 interview with the Escapist on YouTube.
If you are concerned about the cuckoldry, I have to tell you it will return for Baldur's Gate 3, they already said so in an interview. It will have a cultural explanation at the very least. However, monogamy is the norm of that setting and Laezel would very well know that her culture is considered weird. That means most interactions she would do would be cautious.
They are also making a 300 page comic book about the origin characters. I imagine it will mess up the prince's backstory/ingame character inconsistencies even more. I honestly don't think he deserves an expanded backstory when his questline is flat and his character is static.
I wish this character got some justice.
If anyone here played Baldur's Gate 1-2, I think he had the potential to be as good as Viconia.
Larian can do better than this.
I anticipate the argument that I can simply not take him with me. That means however that I'm voluntarily cutting out a huge chunk of the content because it sucks. It's not a good argument. Especially because as I mentioned before, origin characters are the intended protagonists of the game.
Feel free to share your own opinions. I stand where I fall, we'll see how long I'm able to.
submitted by Porpo85 to DivinityOriginalSin [link] [comments]

Through 2019, I've played over 70 games, and have beaten 39 of them. Here's a short review for all of them.

I made it a goal this year to play as many games as I possibly could and try to deplete my backlog. Through doing that, I've played games this year that have made me laugh, cry, complain, hate, and love. I enjoy seeing others post game reviews like this, so hopefully there are others out there like me who just enjoy reading about games.
All games that I've completed are listed in chronological order from when I beat them, and contain a #/10 for final review score (for the ones that I completed). As a bonus, there will be three segments: Completed, Currently playing/hope to get back to, and Retired. At the end, I will include a TLDR; for my completed games in three sections; Good, Average, and Bad. Like others, I used howlongtobeat which proved to be a great tool for my backlog and clearing it out. Here we go:
 
January 2019
 
Condemned: Criminal Origins
I had tried this game a couple years back and it didn't really click. When I tried it this year something changed and I felt the need to keep playing it. The premise of the game is very unique, and although there seem to be a few games like this on Steam, there really isn't an experience like this on console. The gameplay is VERY dated, but the story, location, and overall feel behind the game drew me into it. I finished the entire game on New Years Day, and had a great time doing it. For anyone looking for a fun, old school CSI/Survival Horror esque game, even though it has its problems, check this one out. 7.5/10.
 
Sleeping Dogs: Definitive Edition
What a game. Like Condemned, this was another game that I initially tried years ago and didn't get hooked on, mainly because the driving is so bad especially when you first start out, but I'm so glad I gave this one another chance. Easily in my top 5 games played this year. Enjoyed every single second of it. Aside from the driving, I have no complaints. This is one of those games where you'll actually want to go do everything else even after you complete the story. It's that good. 9/10
 
Crysis 2
Extra short review because I kinda just blew through this one. Didn't really enjoy it at all, and while this series may have been ahead of its time, its not too impressive playing it in 2019. No story and forgettable gameplay, two things that a campaign of a multiplayer focused game relies on. You're much better off playing through one of the call of duty's if you want an FPS campaign. 4/10
 
Bioshock: Remastered
Forewarning for this one and another review coming up: I'm not a fan of this series. This is another one I tried years ago on the 360, gave up on (see a trend?), but decided to give it another go after hearing all the praise for this series. Let me just say, Bioshock is not a bad game at all, obviously, but for some reason it just didn't click with me like it has other people. I enjoyed my time with the game, but wasn't left speechless after it. The setting got old, the story never really interested me, and the gameplay was quite similar to that of other games (Fallout in particular). It looks and performs quite well as a remaster, and I'd say that's probably the best thing I have to say about the game. Not bad, but not deserving of the critical acclaim it has gotten IMO. 7/10
 
Batman: Arkham Asylum
Stepped out of my comfort zone with this one. I've never seen a batman movie before, nor did I/do I have a desire to before/after beating the game, but I still somehow enjoyed it. It's a nice little change of pace from many games, as the combat is melee focused and is set to one main location with other branching locations instead of the overly used open-world. The backtracking did get tiresome, but overall as a non-batman fan I enjoyed it. Definitely recommend it to somehow looking for a change of pace type of game. 7.5/10
 
D4: Dark Dreams Don't Die
After beating Deadly Premonition and it subsequently moving into my Top 5 favorite games of all time, I decided to give D4 a try after realizing I had downloaded for free years and years ago. All I have to say is this: Swery is a genius. Not a game I would have EVER expected to like, but one that I couldn't put down. Wacky characters, plot, setting, and gameplay all make D4 just a fun, enjoyable experience. It was meant to be an episodic game, but was unfortunately cancelled after the first episode, and it did leave on a little bit of a cliffhanger. Although the talk around the street is that this game won't be finished, we do have hope considering Swery shocked the world announcing Deadly Premonition 2 for next year, a game which I won't be patient for. If you just want wacky experience, definitely check this one out. 8.5/10
 
Bioshock 2
You're probably wondering why this one is on the list if you read through my Bioshock 1 summary. Well, I am too. I had burning desire for whatever reason to return to Bioshock, and experience Bioshock 2, and honestly, my experience was basically the exact same as Bioshock 1 but a little worse. While I found Bioshock 1 to have a forgettable story, I found Bioshock 2 to have a REALLY forgettable story. I also wasn't a fan of the increased combat that was put into this game, as I feel like this is the type of game where exploration should be focus and not fighting a enemies every time you enter a new location or room. Again, not a terrible experience, just not one that left a lasting impression on me whatsoever. 6/10
 
February 2019
 
Mass Effect 1, 2, and 3
Here's where the tears come in. Wow. Just wow. Before playing this series I never thought anything in any type of entertainment could be this good. I was wrong. Mass Effect 1-3 is the greatest achievement in entertainment history. Am I saying this after doing/watching/playing everything that has ever been put out? No. But I am saying it as I'm confident I, like many others, will NEVER have the pleasure of experiencing anything like the first run through the Mass Effect Trilogy ever again. This is a must play for people not even interested in gaming. The plot that carries over across all three games while taking everything you did from the previous game into account is something that I haven't seen replicated in gaming since, and that was over 12 years ago. The story, world, characters, and gameplay is truly something remarkable in all of entertainment. 2 was my favorite, only because of all the amazing characters you got to meet, otherwise 1 was very close behind. 3 was great, and despite what all the critics had to say, I felt the ending was justified. 10/10
 
Shadow Of The Tomb Raider
A much better entry into the Tomb Raider franchise than Rise, one of the two games which I credit that turned me into a patient gamer. The gameplay was more enjoyable than Rise, and the somewhat open-world sections that the devs added was a nice little change to the series. I still don't think this was nearly as good as Tomb Raider (2013), but this one is definitely still worth checking out. 7/10
 
The Technomancer
My first truly bad experience of 2019. This game was just bad. It had potential and you can see it when you play it, but unfortunately it's just bad. So bad. The plot is bad, the characters are bad, and the gameplay is just downright garbage. The one thing that had true potential which was the world was just shamelessly butchered as well. No one should touch this game. 1/10
 
March 2019
 
The Wolf Among Us
Another masterpiece. This was my first telltale game and I'm scared to play another one because I know it will probably not come close to comparing to TWAU. This game has twists and turns that you wouldn't have ever expected, and draws you into the world VERY quickly. This was another one that was hard to put down. The voice acting and story are top notch, and HOLY COW, WOLF AMONG US 2 COMING?? Other than Deadly Premonition 2, it's currently my most hyped upcoming game. 10/10
 
DmC: Devil May Cry (2013)
My first and possibly my last entry in the DMC series. I know its considered to be the worst or at least one of the worst games in the series, but the main draws of the game just bored me to death. The weird enemies types with the spam attack hack-n-slashing combat just really didn't provide me with joy. The story was interesting IMO and the boss fights were cool, but just running around hack n slashing everything as well as backtracking to certain locations just wasn't fun at all to me. Another forgettable experience. 6/10
 
Watch Dogs 2
This one really surprised me. I was in the minority where I actually really enjoyed Watch Dogs 1, but held off this one due to vocal people saying that this game was political nonsense. My experience with the game was the complete opposite, as I played it from pure game perspective and didn't think much in the overall deep meaning of the plot. The setting was great, and as someone who lives near SF but absolutely hates the city IRL, it was still quite cool to experience something so similar in a game. The graphics were great, the gameplay was smooth, and the characters were interesting, which in total made Watch Dogs 2 a great experience. There were a few characters who were over the top or just not needed in the game, but all I had to do was skip the scenes they were in. 8.5/10
 
Thimbleweed Park
My first true point and click game since the early 2000's. Im a big fan of detective/mystery games, so this one was on my list for a while. Since I lack the mental capacity to solve most puzzles in games, I did have to use a walkthrough for a large part of this game. Even so, I still very much enjoyed this game. If you're looking for a fun point and click adventure game with tons of mystery included, this is a great game to choose. 7.5/10
 
Bound By Flame
As an RPG fan, I had to give this one at least a try. After the horror that I experienced in The Technomancer, I didn't know what to expect with this one. This was just average all the way through. Literally take the definition of an RPG and put it into this game. Much better than The Technomancer, but still not that good of an RPG. I'd probably suggest only to play this If you run out of other RPGs or simply just want a mediocre experience. Also, what's up with Spiders making the ability to climb up objects impossible if you're in combat? You have to clear out every single enemy in an area if you want to continue on, and this includes the backtracking and minor areas. One of the most annoying things I can remember experiencing in a video game. 5/10
 
Outward
Wasn't patient for this one but I wish I was. Like Bound By Flame, this is just an insanely bland RPG, and in this case, is considered a "Hardcore RPG". It's hardcore in the fact that you REALLY have to want to play this game otherwise you're going to be bored within an hour. Its not worth having to make the 10 minute walk across the map 10-20 times to get supplies and to complete quests. Just a totally bland game that I would've quit right away if I hadn't bought it on release. Another great example on why to be a patient gamer. I also found out later on this year that this game was already made in 2009, and was much better then. I'll save that for a later review. 4/10
 
April 2019
 
Dead Rising 2 Remastered
A classic. This was my first replay of 2019, but this time it was the remastered version. I played through Dead Rising 2 5-6 times on my 360 solo and with different coop partners. The remastered version is just a better version of this great game. Absolutely flawless performance even on my OG Xbox One. This game is the ultimate sit back and chill game. 8.5/10
 
L.A. Noire
My second replay of 2019, and, up until I played the Mass Effect series earlier in the year, was my favorite game of all time. Crime/noir is my favorite genre of games, and it's too bad we really don't see many of them anymore. L.A. Noire blows every other crime game out of the water, and not only that, but throws in the detective element and makes you feel like you are truly investigating the cases in the game. The noir element is also just totally flawless in the game. While the performance of the remastered version was again, flawless, I really didn't like how they removed the Truth/Lie dialogue options with "Good Cop/Bad Cop". I honestly preferred the last gen version. Still, I consider this game a masterpiece. 10/10
 
South Park: The Fractured But Whole
Was hoping to play this after I saw the new season to get into the mood, but decided to dive right in instead. To this day, the South Park games are the only turn-based games that I've managed to play through. While I preferred the premise of The Stick Of Truth better, I still absolutely loved my time with this game. It truly is remarkable that not only are Trey and Matt able to continually make arguably the greatest show in entertainment history, but also put out really great games. 8/10
 
June 2019
 
Assassins Creed: Odyssey
I spent all of May playing this one, so that should tell most of what you need to know. I'm a sucker for Ubisoft games and the mindless enjoyment I get out of them. While nothing Odyssey does is groundbreaking, it still provided me with more than 65 hours of content and that's without the DLC, which I hope to get back to someday. Due to the story and characters, I think this is better than Origins, although both are great games worthy of your time. I'm glad the series has turned into an basically open world RPG, because I was not a fan at all of any of the older AC games. 9/10
 
Brutal Legend
Didn't even know this game existed until I picked it up over the summer. It was a fun little experience. Extremely unique, but I wasn't a fan of the main RTS element and the very empty open world. Music was fantastic though, and I really enjoyed the plot. Wish we had more games that went really outside the box like this. 7/10
 
Alpha Protocol
My second bad experience this year. I heard so many positives about this game, but I just hated absolutely every second of this one. The so-called story and "decision making" that I heard so much about was, IMO, a total lie, as none of the decisions you make truly matter, and not to mention they're insanely quickly timed so half the time you don't even know what you're picking. Im going to say it, this is just a very, very, very bad prequel to Hitman: Absolution (yes, I liked that game). This one should be buried and forgotten. 2/10
 
Wanted: Weapons Of Fate
Another one of my 360 pickups during the summer. Not much to summarize as it's apparently a video game version of a movie I had never seen or heard of. It's a nice little straightforward action game that's playable for its duration, which is only about 6 hours. Easily beaten in a day. 6/10
 
Heavy Rain
Finally got to this one after wanting to play it for so long. I heard it had everything that I wanted: Crime, Mystery, Noir elements....... and it absolutely delivered on all fronts. I actually accidentally spoiled the plot for myself a few years ago which put me off of the game for so long, but since I only knew the major twist, everything else was new to me making it extremely enjoyable to start to finish. People talk about the mainstream PS exclusives like God Of War, Bloodborne, etc., but not enough talk goes into Heavy Rain and it's later counterpart, Until Dawn. 9/10
 
July 2019
 
The Bureau: XCOM Declassified
Now I'm totally in the minority on this one, but I really enjoyed this game. Disclosure: I've never played any other XCOM game due to them being turn-based, which is why I gave this one a try. This game is solid all around, but where it shines is the setting. Some of the locations that this game puts you in, including places in New Mexico and CA, along with your base of operations, are very unique. Unless all the hate for this game was from XCOM fanboys who wanted more turn-based, than I truly don't understand what the deal was. This was a great game. 8/10
 
Tacoma
Again, not much to really review here. A walking sim in space with its own little touch on interaction and dialogue. It's very colorful and different from most walking space sims. If you're a fan of these types of games, I think this one might be worth checking out. 7/10
 
Gears Of War: Ultimate Edition
As the 3rd person cover shooter genre is growing quickly on me, I decided to check out the series that a number of people have credited with starting it. I also started out with the goal of playing through the entire series for the first time before Gears 5 came out. Ultimately, it fell short after this one, but I'll save that for later. GoW: UE is a great remaster. The graphics are phenomenal, and gameplay is smooth, and seemingly is the way that someone starting out on Gears Of War should start their entry into the series. The grass is not so greener after this one, but this game by itself is definitely worth your time. 7.5/10
 
August 2019
 
Red Faction: Guerrilla Remarstered
Didn't know how I expected this one going. I love Sci-Fi and space, and had never played a labeled destruction game before, but as soon as I stepped foot on Mars, I knew this was going to be a good one. You truly don't know how enjoyable breaking everything is until you do it, and that's all you need to focus on while playing this game. Yea other elements are there, but the destruction is just so damn satisfying that it makes this game just worth it for that. 8/10
 
Gears Of War 2
Man did I have to absolutely slog through this one. I've seen people credit this game as the best in the series, but all I credit it as is the game which completely killed any interest I had in Gears of War. You can only run through caves for so long before it gets mind numbingly boring. Not to mention the completely random story bits that this game throws in. This was not a fun game at all to play. 3/10
 
September 2019
 
Dark Pictures Anthology: Man Of Medan
After playing until dawn 3 years ago and immediately saying right afterwards "If only supermassive did an anthology series. I'd buy every game on release", here we are 3 years later and they actually are doing exactly that. While I wouldn't say that this one is as good as Until Dawn, it's still a fantastic game and one that all fans of Until Dawn should experience. Not to mention it has Shawn Ashmore in it, one of the greater lesser known actors. 8/10
 
October 2019
 
Risen 1
Remember how I said a far superior version of Outward had come out in 2009? Yea, this it it. This was the ideal hardcore RPG experience I was looking for. It had everything: Fantastic story, great characters, janky combat, among all the other things that I look for in an RPG. Perhaps the most surprising part of this game was the Dialogue, and dare I say may be the best dialogue of any game that I have ever played. They have some lines in this one that are absolutely hilarious, and the best part is you would have never expected a game like this to have such strong writing, which makes it even better. This game was so close to being a legitimate masterpiece if it wasn't for the last chapter in the game which almost killed my enjoyment in the game. Other than that, this is a must play RPG. 9/10
 
Far Cry 3
Another one on the long list of games that I tried years ago and decided on trying again this year. Far Cry 3 ended up being just an average experience. Cheesy story, tedious objectives (crawl up a tower, liberate an outpost, rinse and repeat). I did like the main missions though, and the setting was pretty cool. A better game than Far Cry 4. 6/10
 
Binary Domain
Boy did I enjoy my time with this one. This one is easily the hidden gem of all my 2019 games if I don't count the arguably more popular Risen 1. This game had it all, but more importantly, found a way to skillfully mix in an engaging and emotional story with a good amount of comedy. Not to mention, it probably has the best shooter physics of any game I've ever played it. It's truly a shame this one is not talked about more. 9.5/10
 
Far Cry 5
Decided to pick this one up after not minding Far Cry 3. Let me start by saying this: Far Cry 5 is BY FAR the best in the series in almost every facet of the series' core. I can't tell you how nice it was not having to climb up 20 towers in the game. Graphics were superb, setting was by far the best in the series, and so was the story. I also didn't realize how much of a powerhouse cast they had for this game until I finished it. Impressive. 8/10
 
November 2019
 
The Outer Worlds
Easily my 2019 GOTY. I haven't had that much fun playing a game since Mass Effect in February. I know I've said it a lot in these reviews, but again, this game had it all. I didn't have a single complaint about this game. Not one. Story, graphics, characters, world, all absolutely phenomenal. I was so glad to see this game get universal acclaim. It deserved it. 10/10
 
Rage 2
And now my worst game of 2019. This game was garbage. That is all I can say about this one. Don't ever waste your time on this POS. I can't believe I did till the end. 1/10
 
December 2019
 
The Darkness
This one was another slog to get through. The reviews of this game from 2007 are not representative of the game today. I can't really say one thing that this game did positive, at least by today's standards, other than offer a unique system of combat. Everything else was just not good. 4.5/10
 
TLDR;
The Good: Mass Effect series, Outer Worlds, Binary Domain, Risen 1, L.A. Noire, The Wolf Among Us, Sleeping Dogs, Watch Dogs 2, Dead Rising 2, Far Cry 5, Assassins Creed Odyssey, Red Faction Guerrilla Remarstered, The Bureau XCOM Declassified, Heavy Rain, South Park Fractured But Whole, D4: Dark Dreams Don't Die
 
The Average: Condemned Criminal Origins, Bioshock 1 & 2, Batman Arkham Asylum, Shadow Of The Tomb Raider, DmC: Devil May Cry, Thimbleweed Park, Brutal Legend, Wanted Weapons Of Fate, Tacoma, Gears Of War Ultimate Edition, Far Cry 3, Bound By Flame
 
The Bad: Crysis 2, The Technomancer, Outward, Alpha Protocol, Gears Of War 2, Rage 2, The Darkness
 
Now onto games that I'm currently playing/hope to get back to....
 
Sekiro: Shadows Die Twice (Playing)
Black Friday pickup. Really enjoying my time with this game, and after absolutely hating Dark Souls, this one has surprised me.
Kingdom Hearts 3 (Playing)
The games locations are so cool, especially after growing up around all these things... but the game is just so boring to play.
Little Nightmares
Not a big fan of sidescrollers but got this one for a good price. About half way through the game, just need to find motivation to finish it.
Fallout: New Vegas
Decided to give NV one more go and actually got into it. Unfortunately it's been paused due to me buying so many games on Black Friday, but it will soon be resumed.
Divinity: Original Sin 2
Enjoyed my time with it but the turn-based combat really just makes it a slow hassle to play. Honestly don't know if I'll return to it.
Metro Exodus
Wasn't a fan of what I had played, but will likely give it another try in the future before I put it down for good.
 
And now for games that have been retired, for the better good....
 
Resident Evil 2
This was my last attempt at trying to get into the Resident Evil franchise. After trying 0, 4, 5 and now 2, this series just isn't for me. I dreaded my time with Resident Evil 2, as I can only take backtracking through the same boring hallways with no ammo so many times. (Black Friday buy - returned)
Control
Didn't have high hopes for this game so I wasn't disappointed, but this game was just really, really bad. Easily the worse lighting/color palette of any game I've ever played, not to mention there's nothing interesting at all about the game and the combat sucks hard. I also had a table stuck around my character 3 times in the first 2 hours. (Black Friday buy - returned)
X-Blades
Just a bad game.
Recore
Enjoyed the game up until the point where I had to deal with BS and wasn't willing to deal with the BS. Didn't leave any lasting expressions on me.
Alien Isolation
I can't stand insta-kill games. I've tried to pick this one up on three different occasions, but the last one was my last straw. Just not a game for me.
Mass Effect: Andromeda
Bad game with the worst voice acting in a video game. What else is there to say?
Red Faction: Armageddon
Bad game that could've been good but instead is bad.
Vampyr
Another game that could've been okay but just fell completely flat on its face.
Ashen
Man, I really did enjoy my time with this game, but once they wanted me to through an entire castle with loads of enemies on each floor and no respawn points, that was it for me sadly.
Bully: Scholarship Edition
Just a boring game. I can see how it might've been fun for its time, but at least for me it doesn't hold up in the slightest.
 
If you made it this far, thank you for reading my 2019 in gaming review! Hopefully it helped out on some games on your list.
submitted by xOfMalice to patientgamers [link] [comments]

[Spoilers] Why I gave Steins;Gate a 4/10

I would like to preface this review with the fact that yes, I do dislike the series so I will be biased against it, but I am not looking to just be a hater of the series or anything, and I’m not interested in any replies saying “well if you don’t like it, just don’t watch it or write about it.” Rather, I am trying to reasonably present some of the most significant flaws I’ve found with the series, and I want to know how fans of the series will respond to or address these issues to justify its place as one of the most popular and well regarded anime. I value this kind of discussion and I would appreciate it if you all would do the same.
Universe: 0/10.
Because this is the biggest gripe I have with the series, and in my mind the one least likely to actually offend anyone, I will get it out of the way first. The way the Steins;Gate universe handles time travel and basic plot mechanics is terrible. No, I’m not talking about absurdities like using black holes to compress data, which makes me giggle but isn’t something unacceptable in a sci-fi anime. Rather, I’m talking about the extraordinary logical inconsistencies that go into the World Line/Time Travel mechanics present in the anime.
One of the first things that the anime establishes is that there is only one “real” world, and when time travel occurs, that world shifts to the new world which is influenced by the time travel, and people’s memories are altered to fit it. That is how they justify people containing memories from “previous” world lines, as well as Okabe’s Reading Steiner. However, this presents a few massive problems.
The most glaring problem is the existence of item/person duplication. Lets say that Okabe travels back in time 10 seconds. There are now two Okabe’s in the world. Since world line shifts “alter memories” and don’t actually completely replace people, where did the second Okabe come from? Not to mention the fact that if the first Okabe decides not to time travel when seeing the second Okabe (something that is acceptable since time travel in Steins;Gate doesn’t enforce perfect loops), there are now permanently 2 Okabe’s in the world line. The more horrifying part is the fact that you can repeat this continuously to get an infinite amount of literally anything you can fit into a time machine, which would be acceptable under certain time travel mechanics but clearly violates the idea that there is only one world and humans in it are unique (they aren’t replaced but rather changed by world line shifts). Steins;Gate “addresses” this by making most of the time machines available in the series incapable of sending actual physical matter, but honestly that’s a lazy band-aid fix since we know there do exist time machines that send physical matter.
Another obvious problem is with Okabe’s power, “Reading Steiner.” Frankly, this power just doesn’t make sense. First of all, the world line switches a fuck ton, and reading Steiner only activates when it’s convinient for the plot. For example, the anime starts in the Beta timeline, meaning there must have been a fuck ton of time travel to get there, some of it probably done by Okabe himself (I haven’t seen Steins;Gate Zero), yet Okabe remembers none of it. It’s honestly just a lazy way of giving Okabe the information necessary to move the plot forward. It also appears to “cut off” somewhat randomly, in the sense that it generally occurs based on the point the world line change originated (generally, Okabe sending the D-mail), but again it doesn’t actually adhere to it particularly consistently (because we know there is other time travel in the series where it doesn’t do jack shit). Finally, this power becomes basically wholly irrelevant when Okabe gains the ability to transfer his consciousness, which makes the idea that it’s somehow important in the grand scheme of things feel laughable and again reinforces the fact that it exists solely to set up the plot.
Outside of the plethora of mechanical contradictions, on a more subjective note, I think that world line convergence is a pathetic plot mechanic that completely destroys any tension or logic within the world. Normally speaking, convergence is something used to force a perfect loop by implying reverse causality (the outcome affects the sequence of events leading to it), like in Harry Potter, but in Steins;Gate, time travel doesn’t involve perfect loops, so convergence simply exists to make sure there’s only one specific yet extremely convenient solution Okabe can use to resolve the problem. In my opinion, this completely gimps the point of time travel, which is that you can use information gained in previous loops to affect the outcome of the current loop. In Steins;Gate, however, you’re literally being bound to two (three) options, meaning that time travel serves more as an “extended action sequence” where you get to see Okabe do a lot of chaotic stuff with absolutely zero tension because you know he can’t die or change anything of consequence. Instead of using his wits or knowledge from cycles to fight SERN, he instead gets to… run around doing random shit in hopes of affecting a number in a random machine gifted to him by the plot. Also, it’s cool that it only affects people around time machines so it affects everyone important but plot irrelevant things are completely ignored, but nonetheless massive changes can happen to things like the PC, Moeka, and Suzuha, despite the fact that they are infinitely more important than Mayuri. Overall, this mechanic just makes the plot feel really contrived, with the authors not being able to come up with any better ways to shoehorn Okabe into a cliche dilemma and specific solution.
Finally, there is the Steins;Gate worldline. This is probably the thing that posed the biggest problem for me. The thing is, a wordline is only “stable” if literally no one ever time travels in the worldline. If someone were to time travel in the Steins;Gate worldline, the world would no longer be in the Steins;Gate worldline, and would never be able to reach that particular wordline again (because a world that was similar to the Steins;Gate worldline but had someone time-traveling back into it would spawn another worldline). This means that for the Steins;Gate worldline to work, the human race as a whole must never reach a point where it can build a time machine, which, considering the existing progress on machines in the show (where they pretty much already exist at SERN), means that humanity has gone extinct in the very near future (or experienced a catastrophic event resulting in irreversible technological regression). Congratulations, Okabe, you’ve fucked all of humanity by simping too hard.
The bigger problem is that this doesn’t just apply to the Steins;Gate worldline, but every worldline, meaning the final stable worldline is the world where everyone is dead or living in mud huts. Convergence might address this (maybe?), but again it’s a convoluted mechanic so we’ll never know
Plot: 4/10
Overall, the plot feels incredibly contrived. What I mean by this is that events don’t feel like they are happening “naturally,” but rather they’re happening because the show’s creators want it to happen; in other words, plot developments that break immersion and make you think of the series as a “show” instead of a “world.” The most obvious example is how each of Okabe’s texts for his friends somehow cause the PC he needs to become inaccessible, and as a result he has to go and undo each one. I remind you that this occurrence was a coincidence in literally every case, from “sold it for money” (which isn’t a direct coincidence but is obviously incidental) to literally “broke it on accident.” There were a million ways to get his hands on the PC without completely undoing every wish (Hey bro, be careful not to smack the PC with your sword) but of course, the show’s creators want to send the message of “oh, Okabe’s friends sacrificing their happiness for the greater good” so we end up with this absurd plot line.
Another example of this is the fact that Suzuha’s time machine “coincidentally” broke due to the storm, meaning that she loses out on her meeting with Daru. Well, who would have expected, Okabe being forced to make another difficult decision due to an act of god, and him handling it in the worst way possible (guess he doesn’t have the mental capacity to tell Suzuha to cover the fucknig thing with a tarp).
This stands out to me even more than the really obvious plot holes, such as the absurdity of the time machine Okabe builds from its circumstances to its operation, the idea of black hole data compression, and the fact that for a large organization, SERN is fucking useless (jfc why send Moeka of all people) and has basically 0 presence despite being the primary antagonist of the series (probably because the actual primary antagonist is the God with all those random occurrences fucking Okabe over).
Overall, while there are a lot of interesting and exciting plot events, it’s hard for me to not take a step back and think “so how did things end up this way?” And when the answer is “something unlucky happened” or “world line convergence dictated it,” I start to feel like it is more the authors deciding things than the world evolving naturally, especially considering the fact that it is a time travel show yet all of these unlucky events are treated as unavoidable realities which can only be prevented by changing the root of the problem instead of, say, telling Ferris to come up with a better way of stopping her dad from getting on an airplane (surely a simple “Please come help me, I’m sick” would do, right?)
As a result, no matter how clever a plot is (and it is pretty clever), if it breaks immersion, it’s hard for me to enjoy it, and nothing breaks immersion harder than people refusing to acknowledge coincidences which fundamentally drive the plot forward.
Characters: 6/10
I find the side characters to be cringy, bland, and only really having one significant quality. I feel like most of them didn’t really get enough screen time to flesh out their characters because the show was so concerned about their plot contributions, causing them to all feel like walking stereotypes. The number of important things they do overshadows their actual qualities beyond the very surface level, making it hard for me to feel invested in them.
Mayuri is a walking plot device whose actual character qualities are never elaborated upon or used for anything, but instead just serves as an impetus for Okabe to do random stuff. The only real “development” is her visit to her grandmother’s grave but that honestly develops her more into her meme trope than fleshes her out as a person (good old hand reaching out to the sky).
Daru is basically a meme character who is a massive walking stereotype and gets no development (No, a hint at future development from your future daughter is not development)
Luka is an embarrassment of an inclusion; I really don’t think I need to explain why, and again, absolutely zero character development (no, acknowledging she is non-binary is not development)
Ferris has reached the point where they obviously aren’t even trying anymore and has again, zero character development (no, tragic backstory due to an accident is not character development)
Moeka is a budget version of Mayuri who is honestly just a big ???. Her character feels really out of place and again, just reminds me of a rehashed version of Mayuri. (and no, committing suicide because of personality issues is not development, it’s just shock factor).
Suzuha is all right, she is kinda necessary to move the plot along and she has some good moments. Honestly probably my favorite character even though I like her design the least simply because she actually feels like a real person.
Now onto the Male/Female leads
When it comes to Kurisu, I honestly don’t think she is a bad character, she just got the interesting part of her personality assassinated by the plot. What I mean by this is that she is initially portrayed as a brilliant scientist, the scene where she shows that (where she proves that time machines don’t exist) is immediately overturned like two seconds later, massively diluting the impact of that aspect of her personality. Later on, even though she’s acknowledged as being important, most of the cool shit we actually see being done is all done by Okabe/Daru, which kinda reduces the part of her that is a genius scientist and shoehorns her further into the “constantly irritated tsundere” trope. This trope is a bit further problematic when you consider the male lead, Okabe.
The thing is that Okabe is really cringe, and intentionally so. The problem I have with this is that I guessed the reason why Okabe had a persona from the first episode, but I dismissed it as I thought that “there’s no way the authors came up with such a terrible and cliche idea.” Well, it really ended up happening; Okabe is doing it for Mayuri. There are a number of problems I have with this. First of all, is there a taboo against anime characters expressing affection like a normal person? I feel like Mayuri would be in a similar state if Okabe just properly expressed how much he cares for her instead of doing the weird scientist thing. Second of all, why the fuck is the scientist thing the best solution he can come up with? How the fuck does it even work? Why hasn’t he just gotten Mayuri therapy or some shit? It’s so absurd that it immediately turns Okabe into someone who isn’t very smart, is very desperate, and has a hard time communicating normally. This also kinda bleeds into Kurisu and turns her into a character who “likes the moronic weirdo and is permanently overshadowed by him,” which in my opinion is quite boring. Overall, I find Okabe to be quite a dislikable character, as his moments of greatness are overshadowed by his moments of mornicism and self-pity.
Frills: 8/10
Sound, artstyle, etc, all decent, but I didn’t find anything particularly outstanding. It isn’t exactly a flash show so there honestly isn’t much to do in this department.
Final Review: 4/10
TL;DR: Time travel mechanics are nonsensical and self-contradictory, plot is constantly fueled by coincidences and world line convergence which breaks immersion, side characters are shallow and serve mostly as plot devices, Kurisu is dragged down by the show and Okabe is dragged down by his own brain.
submitted by chenerei to steinsgate [link] [comments]

DIY Designer Candles!

Hello ladies, gents, and non-binary bougie pals! I took it upon myself to do what no one wanted and no one asked for: DIY designer fragrance candles!

Obligatory aside: this is my first time posting here in repladies, and my first time making an attempt at a longer posting in general, so bear with me and my formatting! I'll do my best. ☺️

A Bit of Background... (not required reading, just context!)

I was OBSESSED with u/onthevergeoftears's post on DIY and rep fragrances, and more recently u/diambra's post on rep. fragrances! I stumbled upon deadass identical to the read thing designer "inspired" perfume oils a bit before I found those posts – my main hookup is OilPerfumery! They've got a large range of Western and Arabian fragrances that I really enjoy (also use code OP20 for 20% off but don't tell them because I'm not supposed to know about that code...) Now, I am but a poor college student and generally do not have the resources to compare their work to the real deal, but I will say their La Vie Est Belle and Light Blue for Her are pretty spot on. Anyways my first DIY dream was to convert the oil perfumes into sprays and transplant them into the authentic bottles. I researched the process for 30 minutes quite some time before deciding I probably didn't have the patience to tackle that yet. My next stroke of genius was to created candles with my perfume oils and transplant them into authentic designer candle cups – helluva lot easier lemme tell you. This came after reading up on people's fears about burning rep candles with how expensive they were to ship because of their weight. With minimal effort, I have achieved some degree of success and would like to share the process and results with you!

The Good Stuff 🤩🕯

1. Cost

I created 2 DIY Jo Malone candles in authentic candle cups – cups? glasses? holders? The whole process was relatively inexpensive (considering the cost of an authentic Jo Malone candle): I purchased 1lb. of paraffin wax from Michael's craft store for $7.50, a package of 9 candle wicks for about $3 I think also from Michael's, my oil perfumes from OilPerfumery for appx. $11 each, and the 2 Jo Malone empty candle jars (we're going with jars now) for $20 on Mercari. I find that between offerup, Poshmark, eBay and Mercari, eBay and Mercari had the most reasonably priced candle jars and empty perfume bottles! I also purchased a teeny plastic syringe and a pack of tin pans from the dollar store for a total of $2. Accounting for only using 2 of my wicks, this project cost me $54 for 2 finished candles. An equivalent candle from Jo Malone costs $78 individually, so I'm pretty proud of my $27 ones! I'm sure it could've been done a bit cheaper had I not poured the entire bottle of oil perfume into my first candle, forcing me to use another bottle for the second candle been a bit more conservative with the amount of fragrance I added to my candles.
Note: I chose to use paraffin wax, despite online hysteria that it will cause cancer – authentic Jo Malone candles also are rumored to use paraffin wax because of their unobtrusive smell (and I didn't see any evidence that really convinced me that my candle would kill me). Soy wax has a very intense and distinctive smell that I found to be rather unpleasant, and I didn't want my perfumes fighting for odoriferous dominance! There's a massive collection of videos on what waxes work best for what on Youtube, take a look for yourself to see what might be the best option for you! I just chose this because the color was close to authentic, it was less stinky, and it was cheap.

2. Production

I said f the rules and didn't match my scents to the original Jo Malone candle jars - I used JM Wild Strawberry and Parsley (so freakin' summery) and I used JM Pomegranate Noir (so not summery but deep and yummy regardless).
I began by melting ½ lb. of the paraffin wax in my DIY double boiler. Wax is a BITCH to get out of your prized cookware, do not melt wax in something you care about. While I waited for the wax to melt, I hot glued my wick into the first jar. That's a lie that I just realized my next photo exposes - I gorilla glued it, which was a terrible idea that didn't work. Hot glue yours. I then attempted to use my dollar store syringe to suck out some of the oil perfume – it sprayed everywhere and my whole kitchen still smells like wild strawberry and parsley, 0/10 do not recommend. Instead, as I did with my second candle, simply remove the rollerball applicator and pour the oil perfume into the wax.
Now I will say, there is a science to adding the oil at the right temperature depending on the type of wax and the shape of the candle, but I was on a mission and did not bother checking the temperature of the wax. I let it melt in the double boiler (and I never allowed the water below it to get to a full boil - it was that stage of teeny baby bubbles all over the bottom of the pan) and then waited about 5 minutes to ensure it was heated thoroughly.
Next, it's time to fill the candle! This is where I was most thankful for my lil syringe. After several failed attempts to pick up the pan and pour the was, I realized that my potholders were completely saturated in wax, and that there was no easy or clean way to pour. Instead, I used the plastic syringe to suck up a bit of melted wax and transplant it into the jar. I'd highly recommend something like this to get the cleanest end results if you're a candle making noob like I am!
Once you've filled the candle with the liquid wax, it's time to let it set (either on the counter or in the fridge). It will set on the outside relatively quickly, but I'd say it took a solid hour for it to be "done" to the point of being stable enough to move around. During this time, you'll need something to support the wick so it stands upright. I struggled, obviously. It was on my second candle that I realized a mechanical pencil clip (or pen clip) did an awesome job! BIG IMPORTANT FACTOID is that upon cooling, you candle will make a weird cratedivet in the middle - there's some scientific reason behind it, I'm just too lazy to find it again. That being said it is important that you don't put all of the wax into your candle jar on the first go - you need to save a bit to fill in the crater. Again, you'll let it set. After that, snip your wick and...

3. Voila!

You have a Jo Malone candle! All things considered, I'm pretty proud with how they turned out! Had I just wanted them for decoration, they would have come out to less than $15 each - I will (probably) eventually burn them to enjoy the scent. They're both fragrant enough that you can smell them within a couple feet of walking by the candles. That being said, ½ bottle of the perfume oil I'm sure would have been plenty, I just have no self control. Save yourself some money for that next TB haul and DIY your next luxe candle! If there's any information I may have missed, please let me know - I'd be happy to fill in the gaps! I'm incredibly lazy and will 100% not proofread this before submitting. Thanks for being such a great community! 💛🥰

Edit: please look at the comments from people much wiser than I explaining some of the scientific-y bits I was too lazy to look into, super important lol

submitted by Kierious27 to RepLadies [link] [comments]

MAME 0.219

MAME 0.219

MAME 0.219 arrives today, just in time for the end of February! This month we’ve got another piece of Nintendo Game & Watch history – Pinball – as well as a quite a few TV games, including Dream Life Superstar, Designer’s World, Jenna Jameson’s Strip Poker, and Champiyon Pinball. The previously-added Care Bears and Piglet’s Special Day TV games are now working, as well as the big-endian version of the MIPS Magnum R4000. As always, the TV games vary enormously in quality, from enjoyable titles, to low-effort games based on licensed intellectual properties, to horrible bootlegs using blatantly copied assets. If music/rhythm misery is your thing, there’s even a particularly bad dance mat game in there.
On the arcade side, there are fixes for a minor but long-standing graphical issue in Capcom’s genre-defining 1942, and also a fairly significant graphical regression in Seibu Kaihatsu’s Raiden Fighters. Speaking of Seibu Kaihatsu, our very own Angelo Salese significantly improved the experience in Good E-Jan, and speaking of graphics fixes, cam900 fixed some corner cases in Data East’s innovative, but little-known, shoot-’em-up Boogie Wings. Software list additions include the Commodore 64 INPUT 64 collection (courtesy of FakeShemp) and the Spanish ZX Spectrum Load’N’Run collection (added by ICEknight). New preliminary CPU cores and disassemblers include IBM ROMP, the NEC 78K family, Samsung KS0164 and SSD Corp’s Xavix 2.
As always, you can get the source and 64-bit Windows binary packages from the download page.

MAME Testers Bugs Fixed

New working machines

New working clones

Machines promoted to working

Clones promoted to working

New machines marked as NOT_WORKING

New clones marked as NOT_WORKING

New working software list additions

Software list items promoted to working

New NOT_WORKING software list additions

Source Changes

submitted by cuavas to emulation [link] [comments]

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